The Voice!

2009-11-06T15:38:00.003+05:30

There is a certain type of people in this world. Maybe they arent as rare as I think they are. They keep having this voice in their head. It is constant,un-ceasing,always close by-the voice not the head. They are amongst us.They are our friends, our brothers,our realtives. We see them everyday and they seem normal,like the rest of us. But they are different. Each in their own way but all of them have one thing in common-the voice! Sometimes they get the urge to shut out the voice.Through meditation.Through sleep.Through writing. But they cant because they were meant to hear what others cant. They were meant to hear the things that others cant.

India's Enron or India's Lay?

2009-01-08T23:23:00.002+05:30

Interesting times we live in:we've had "India's 9/11","India response to its 9/11","India's Enron","India's Madoff" in the last one month.I just wonder-cant we be original,atleast in naming our tragedies? Swadheshi anyone? All this led me to think-the closest comparison between the events surrounding Satyam in the last 24hrs and Enron was in the protaganists themselves-Kenneth Lay and Ramlinga Raju. I know some people have felt it was unfair to,of all people, Raju.
I'm sure Skilling, as the convicted mastermind of Enron's multibillion-dollar fraud, rode that same tiger, but he never did apologize or admit wrongdoing, even as a federal appeals court this week upheld his conviction. And if the Enron and Satyam fiascos seem similar in scope -- Forrester Research analyst John McCarthy says "there's never been anything close in scale to this fraud in the IT services business" -- they're not entirely similar. For one thing, the Enron and Satyam chiefs come from different stock.

But as some others have pointed out, the similarities are just too startling to ignore.

"Two things strike you when you meet Ramalinga Raju. One, it's difficult to find a more soft-spoken Indian CEO - so soft-spoken that it's often difficult to hear what he says. And two, he opens up only when you ask him about corporate governance issues. The moment you switch to any other topic related to Satyam [Get Quote], the answers are mostly in monosyllables.
I remember one such meeting when Raju bored me to death talking in details about how Satyam believes that better corporate governance enhances business results and helps the company deliver higher value to all its stakeholders. He also referred to the two Golden Peacock awards for excellence in corporate governance that Satyam won and how such awards provide greater encouragement to continue improving the company's corporate governance practices in future."

K.Lay was also known to "bore to death" anyone who would listen about his ethical high ground-check out this link-engrossing reading. Quote below is from another source:

"Integrity: We work with customers and prospects openly, honestly and sincerely. When we say we will do something, we will do it." This is true. Enron promised its execs they would make money and for a while, they did. McLean reported, "In Enron's energy services division, which managed the energy needs of large companies like Eli Lilly, executives were compensated based on a market valuation formula that relied on internal evidence. As a result, says one former executive, there was pressure to inflate the value of the contracts, even though it had no impact on the actual cash that was generated."
• "Communication: We believe that information is meant to move and that information moves people." Enron's communication skills were on display in an Oct. 16 press release that announced a $618 million loss but failed to say that it had written down shareholder equity by $1.2 billion.
• "Excellence: We are satisfied with nothing less than the very best. We will continue to raise the bar for everyone." Raise the bar, live behind bars, it's all semantics.

They say you cant teach ethics to a 26-yr old in business school...but atleast you can teach 'em not to write stuff people will snicker about after you are dead and gone!!

More later...about the "Independent board members"...

Untitled

2008-12-31T01:14:00.003+05:30

First piece of fiction Ive written...lets see where this journey takes me.

December's in Chennai arent known for anything. Except maybe the 'music season';only the brahmins went there though,no self respecting son of the soil would be found dead in the Music Academy's Krishnamachari hall.The weather isnt remarkable either,it is hot, the first in the oft-quoted trilogy of weather in Chennai-hot,hotter and hottest. So with nothing to do and un-remarkable weather to aid,Kabilan made the call that set in motion a rather interesting day in my life.

'Bella Ciao' was the new restaurant in town. 'Eatery' as only Kabilan likes to call it. He wasnt exactly a coarse guy in the typical Chennai sense-he spoke Thamizh without sounding like he had constipation ,as most inhabitants of the city usually do. He wasnt dense either,finishing engineering school in one of the prominent schools in the city.

"Macha,come to Bella Ciao,you know where it is,right?".I dint like what he was implying, that I dint know where one of the hottest spots in Chennai was.
"Why Bella Ciao? We could meet at the usual places around Anna Nagar?"
"Illa da, I'll explain, come NOW". His implications kept getting worse, I do have a life of my own you know.
"Ok"

With much goading and no expectation, I went to meet the finely mannered Mr. Kabilan at 'Bella Ciao'. You get the feeling as soon as you enter 'Bella Ciao' that its owner has never been to Italy. You dont know why you feel this way,you havent been to Italy either. You just look at the place and know immediately that it tries too hard.Couple of twenty-something PYT's smoke a local brand. I stared at them a little longer than I should have.You always stare at women who smoke in Chennai. You've seen it before of course,but you just have to stare-its a guy thing. Kabilan was sitting the way he usually does-facing the women,leaving me with a strategic view of Toys-R-Us located opposite.The objective of tonight's rendezvous was well known. We'd had a couple of conversations about this on phone and email. Kabilan was seeing someone;as in dating her and not just staring.

I ordered the only Italian food that made any sense to me-spinach ravioli.It almost made you tolerate the Italian who was ruling your country.That out of the way I looked at Kabilan for an Ice-breaker,no soup or 'ante-pasta' this time,I was runnning a little low on cash, what with the credit crunch and all.The waiter hung on a little longer than he should have,I felt. If only he'd known that I wanted to eat Minestrone soup as much as he wanted me to.

"I dont know where this is going,da" Kabilan said,avoiding my eyes.
"She is nice,good looking in a Thamizh sense,and holds a decent job". He trailed off in a way that was supposed to mean that all was not well with his love life.
"Ok"
"See the thing is that she'd be an excellent partner for me.She wants to do an MBA and all..she is very ambitious" Hmm,something was badly wrong with his love life.
"Okayy...so whats the catch" I snapped.I felt I shouldnt have as soon as I said it.
"She met my mother yesterday" Ah-haa.There's the problem.

Life Since 2004...

2008-12-08T01:48:00.003+05:30

Just had a flash of thought in the shower today...my life since 2004...

2004-mildly depressing to start with,GOT EMPLOYED!!! in september,euphoria
2005-left home,started on top;went south,really south in the end
2006-started going south;depressing,suicidal;lots of mistakes;started on a journey of learning
2007-mission,vision, whatever;"anything's better than 2006" kinda attitude;LOTS of learning on the way
2008-SUPER Learning,career progression,travel,life's direction makes sense(only a lil bit actually);good fun on the way!

Back

2008-09-01T17:13:00.002+05:30

I am now officially re-starting this blog. Look forward to this. Not been blogging for various reasons-general depression,lack of time etc. What is up with me? Well same old same old...still in hyderabad, in the same company...enjoying work and having fun. Hopefully will be able to blog a few things Ive been thinking about lately...

Final Lap

2008-03-16T18:57:00.001+05:30

Here it is. The final lap towards GMAT. Looking to hit 740. Got 9 more days to go. Time to step on the gas and really do it!

Early Update

2008-01-08T18:41:00.001+05:30

-Fucked up my tax planning for this FY. Late investment decisions, no reimbursments etc. Need to look at financial planning afresh next year-including demat etc.

-The above resulted in a 'credit crunch' this week leading to harried phone calls back home. Embaressment ensued.

-Started SC today. Area I need to improve the most...say it again and again 750 Q50 V42...750 Q50 V42...750 Q50 V42..yaaaa baby...

-Work is going on ok...doing work I like.

-TM- a new start. Need to work on the theme of the day-'A New Begining'!

2008-01-01T01:27:00.001+05:30

Post from gmail...hello...mail testing...

என் முதல் தமிழ் பதிவு...

2007-04-20T22:33:00.000+05:30

தமிழில் பதிவு செய்ய ஆசை தான் ஆனால் வழி முறை ரொம்ப கஷ்டமா இருக்கு...ஆங்கிலத்தில் எழுதி தமிழ் வரவைப்பது கஷ்டம் இல்லயா பின்ன...

2007-01-29T15:21:00.000+05:30

There are some moments in life that are worth the grim and toil that precede them...reading this news article was one such moment...

"Maruti Udyog Ltd said on Monday it will hike prices of its products by up to Rs 12,000 next month. "We have informed our dealers about the planned price hike to be effective from Feb 1, the company's CEO and MD Jagdish Khattar told reporters in New Delhi. "

I just took delivery of a brand new Icy blue Maruti 800.

Your first car is always special. But it becomes that much more sweeter when you realise that some come-latlelys are going to get ripped... :))))

The car is good. I havent gotten used to the 2 extra wheels completely....just a matter of time i guess.

Got myself a SOHO

2006-12-21T13:20:00.000+05:30

thats a Small Office Home Office. Now I can work from home for most part of the week-unless there is some con-call or local meeting. Iqara at the end of the day is good. My sweetheart also seems to be in ok shape. Only trouble is that I work closely with a 3rd party. And they cant access me on chat.

But my plan is to work from home only on Fridays...lets see how that works out.

2006-12-19T16:06:00.000+05:30

Its been a month since I blogged. In this month Ive insured myself,invested in a mutual fund,got an office laptop, tried to get a broadband connection, tried to renew my passport,booked airline tickets......basically tried to live my normal life. Unfortunately, all these things require me to be in touch with people-more specifically customer service agents.

Ive got one word to describe customer service in Hyderabad- it sucks. I know its not a Hyderabadi phenomenon...there must be crappy service ppl all over the country. But these guys have to take the cake if there ever was a crappiest service competition.

Iqara broadband-"We havent received the confirmation mail from Surat, sir". Surat? WTF is surat? As a result I may end up without a connection till the start of 2007.

Prudential ICICI-"Our customer service rep will get in touch with you this weekend". Its been 3 weeks since she said that. Nothing. Well HSBC just got my money suckers!

Reliance Broadnet-Same as above. Only Iqara has been much worse.

Less said about the passport renewal experience the better.

ICICI Prudential- Dint receive my bond till a week back...after a month of hollering on the phone.

Why do we suck so bad at customer service?? Is it an Indian genetic phenomenon??

For more cribs about crappy service visit here.

2006-11-22T20:20:00.000+05:30

When someone sends a pompous sounding mail like,"Send me all your question,suggestions,improvement areas in this project" I shld have just kept quiet. Instead the devil in me took over and I sent a foot-long mail to the originator, my manager.

I DID NOT expect a reply from his boss!! @#$%%^^ had forwarded my mail to him with a "FYI"!!!

Nice lesson in corporate warfare:Shut the fuck up.

2006-11-06T20:55:00.000+05:30

Time to take stock.

Because after a very long time I actually prayed to god. Last time I did that was proabably when I was expecting my Control Systems re-eval. Heck I dint even pray after the GRE disaster.

Why? Well I am doing this really challenging job that is sapping me. I am watching 'The Departed' in PVR and am thinking "What if the DBA blows it?", "What if the client says 'No good'", "What if they find out that I am an amateaur?". And its fucking killing me.

To be sure, if someone had come to me a year ago and told me that I would be doing what am doing then I would have proabably accepted it without hesitation. But....

Stressful times ahead.

2006-10-31T15:41:00.000+05:30

Reading through the 'The innocent man' and watching the Matoo 'trial by TV' can be injurious to your productivity. Ive been writing this Delhi based novel in my head for the past 2 days.

Wealthy business man-turned-politico's son. Bar fight. Three shots. Two dead girls. Brat gets arrested. Acquited at first.Under pressure? Maybe, maybe not. Then starts a TV trial...with blogs on the side-line. Accused gets on the death-row. Is put to death.Three years later....

You get the picture dont you. We live in an exciting time. Wonder why no one has stood up and claimed Grisham's place or for that matter Forsyth's place in India. Anirudh Bahal is a joke...spent 350 bucks to find out but he IS a joke.

2006-10-19T14:07:00.000+05:30

Ive always believed that I paid too much tax. Thats how the 'tax-saving plan' started. A call here and a call here and a call there...boom I get to pay less taxes now. Only thing I forgot was that lil matter of the post dated cheque just after Diwali! Kaboom...no money...stuck here. Not that I'll be so desperately out of cash, but its always nice to have some money at the end of the year...

It shouldnt be too bad really. I'll be home alone...so am off to another friends place for the week-end...shouldnt be too bad...get drunk watch some movie...try to get my hand on this...oooo what would i not give to see it NOW.

Happy Diwali everyone...watch Varalaaru-The history of the godfather....dont watch Vallavan...

2006-10-05T17:59:00.000+05:30

Ive never been a firm beleiver in the concept of 'violent movies and video games evoke violent behaviour in kids' theory. It sucks. Dint make any sense when I was young, still doesnt. But a few days ago I saw Resevoir Dogs....and one scene kinda....pushed me over the edge, if you will...

Mr. Blonde: Listen kid, I'm not gonna bullshit you, all right? I don't give a good fuck what you know, or don't know, but I'm gonna torture you anyway, regardless. Not to get information. It's amusing, to me, to torture a cop. You can say anything you want cause I've heard it all before. All you can do is pray for a quick death, which you ain't gonna get. [He removes his razor]

Mr. Blonde: You ever listen to K-Billy's "Super Sounds of the Seventies" weekend? It's my personal favorite.

Yeap. The "ear scene" kinda got to me...nahh i havent killed anyone yet...but I keep going thru this in my head...I see what they're talking about...guess I was just lucky not to have seen such movies when i was 10...who knows...

Mr. Orange: [after killing Mr. Blonde] Hey you, what's your name?
LAPD Officer Marvin Nash: Marvin.
Mr. Orange: Marvin what?
LAPD Officer Marvin Nash: Marvin Nash.
Mr. Orange: Listen to me, Marvin, I'm a c - [pauses]
Mr. Orange: ...listen to me, Marvin Nash, I'm a cop.
LAPD Officer Marvin Nash: Yeah, I know.
Mr. Orange: You do?
LAPD Officer Marvin Nash: Yeah, you're name's Freddy something.
Mr. Orange: Newendyke. Freddy Newendyke.
LAPD Officer Marvin Nash: Frankie Ferchetti introduced us about five months ago.
Mr. Orange: Shit, I don't remember that at all.
LAPD Officer Marvin Nash: I do. Freddy... Freddy, how do I look?
Mr. Orange: [Freddy laughs] I don't know what to tell you, Marvin.
LAPD Officer Marvin Nash: That fuck! That sick fuck! That fucking bastard!
Mr. Orange: Marvin, I need you to hold on. There's cops waiting less than a block away.
LAPD Officer Marvin Nash: What the fuck are they waiting for? This fucking guy slashes my face, and he cuts my fucking ear off! I'm fucking deformed!
Mr. Orange: [yells] FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! I'M FUCKIN' DYING HERE! I'M FUCKIN' DYING! [pauses and calms down]
Mr. Orange: All right, now you heard them, we'll make the move when they get back, so don't pussy out on me now, Marvin. We're just gonna sit here and bleed until Joe Cabot sticks his fucking head through that door!

Random Observations...

2006-09-25T17:50:00.000+05:30

....in Chennai:-

1.) In an hour's drive from home to airport I saw about 500 ppl with an engineering drafter and a ruck-sack. When they say that the OMR is going to have more engineers/sq.inch than Silicon Valley, they mean it. What we do when we get there is another story.

2.) There is just too much opportunity for a young man/lady. NOKIA buses in kilpauk, CTS buses in egmore, chat with an infy friend about the "mcity campus",great lakes inst. mgmt, dell coming,nike coming....its a fucking gold rush out there.

3.) Chennai domestic airport has been re-habilitated. And very well. Heck I dont need no privatisation anymore. Seriously. It has to be seen to be beleived. Hyderabad domestic on the other hand is a different story...nearly died in a riot on Friday.

4.) Spice Jet kicks the shit out of Air Deccan. Any day.Any time.

5.) Reading 'Snapshots from Hell' in a flight is a good thing...its prob. one of the best conversation starters for a wannabe mba...met a Berkley grad who is some hot-shot in Satyam...need to follow-it up....darn am not bad in networking at all :))

6.) My boss is quiting. I am not exactly crying over it, but thats one good recco writer out of the bag...am I a bad person for thinking this way?

7.) My cousin is getting married to a Kannadiga Brahmin. While that doesnt interest me that much, my parents' reaction to the event has been rather subdued and 'understanding'....interesting....very interesting.

8.) I guess I dont like Anna Nagar that much...dont know why...pudikala this time.

9.) Ive realised that the cause of all my worries is that the average time I am sober has gone up...seriously....nothing like a quarter Romanov to get some perspective...am getting drunk today.

10.) Cant think of anything fo the 10 th point.

2006-09-11T21:58:00.000+05:30

Wannabe-hot-shot: Hi Arun, can you check the mail from MNS on reconciling the PMs, please? I especially want to know if ALL the recent project assignments are reflected in the Regions information on STS. The reconciliation is about Home Regions, but it will help to know if you have all the Working Regions (Column B on STS) are set correctly also; the Region where an IPM is working may affect which Region we choose for Parent Region in the Reconciliation. Can you help me on this?

Arun: No.

Isnt it funny when an up-and-comer-but-not-yet-boss kinda person tries to make you do his work? He cant fire you, so u can do pretty much what you want. By the time he becomes boss you'd be long gone(hopefully sipping martini in Hawaii).

This btw, is the only work Ive done all day. Depressing, I know. Am not much of a team-player, I know. I dont have initiative. I know that too. You know what....screw them.

2006-08-30T19:02:00.000+05:30

Reached a rather important milestone in my project. Now I guess I can throw my hands-up and relax a bit...come home early...act like a normal human-being. Still have a 100 things to do...have to do some 'ass-hole management' in the Toastmasters club(slowly becoming a PITA...kinda things u have to do for a bullet point on ur resume..) ...need to do a course in ITIL...am seriously thinking of a career change to hard-core process consulting with ITIL...need to think about it, though i dont know when...thinking about doing a six-sigma gb cert....though that comes with a rider that i complete a project...and thats not what i do well...but need to do it anyway cos of "career pressure"...there's also the matter of a capm cert....and in the middle of all this career bull-shit, ive missed out on a few commitments ive made to some good people...simply over-whelmed..

And I need to take a well-deserved break from the rat race, go to chennai, meet long-lost friends...the things that normal ppl do...things I used to do earlier...wtf am I turning into? a machine?

Well, I know about delayed gratification...about a "better tomorrow"...about hard work...I dint do it when I was young, so here I am...but some times you just want to give it all up and run away.

Dont you?

2006-08-14T18:54:00.000+05:30

Pardon the long gap. Been very busy. No, seriously. Please yaravadhu nambunga! Been working the graveyard-shift...to attend some stupid meetings with Americans. First time I am working with a "Principal Computer Scientist"...a cerified a*&^&e if there ever was one...he's been screwing with me for 2 weeks now...seriously regretted not getting into a call-centre...easy money seems so alluring. A young 2 month old kid can be easily killed if all the paper-work that I've been filling was thrown on it. Bad analogy I know...such are times.

Some good news-I am a chitappa now(is that chitappalu in Telegu??). The kuppuswamy-family has in its midst a crying baby for the first time in 17 years. Damn am growing old!! But not as old as my grand-pa...who is now a great-grandpa. Have to meet the old man-Ive never seen a great-grandpa before.

Otherwise its life as usual. Oh, not if you count the 3 hours I spent watching KANK(has a bad sound to it, doesnt it?). Would watch the movie again for the Mitwaaaaa number....supposed to be sung by a Paki...havent hrd anything like it before. Other than that a horrendous waste of 3 hours watching sepiamutiny-types crying and screwing other ppl's wives.

Oh and am officialy joining the "MBA bandwagon"...researching b-schools...visiting GMATclub at 2'0clock in the night...trying to understand from where I am going to get the"upwards of 40 lakhs" moneys that I am going to need...rehearsing lines I am going to use on my dad for the money...bigger post about this next...

2006-08-04T00:50:00.000+05:30

"Friendship day" today. My employer is conducting an essay competition...supposed to write an essay on "What does friendship mean to you?"...what does friendship mean to me?? Friendship for me is a phone call at the end of a tired day..."Mama, fucked-up day today...she is such a @#$%^ da...you were soo right"...Its about wearing a hearty smile after I dis-connect, knowing that there is one Mama out there who cares.

Its about going to Joss. Sitting there in that dingy restaurant and reminiscing about old times, good times. Nahhh, thats not what its about. Its about sitting here 1000 km away and reminiscing about Joss.

Its also about the fights. On some earth-shatteringly petty issues. Like Tina for example. Is she a "good girl" or not, knowing fully well that she doesnt give a rats ass about what we think.

Its about feeling let-down by your buddy when you learnt that he failed his Circuits exam, scoring 5 and a half, to your own 3. "How could you da??". Its also about weathering a few storms that any relationship has to. Like the time when I blabbered away about Mr. AA's girl-friend in a conference-call, not knowing that he was in the call. And then laughing it away with the two @#$%%^^#$ who laid the ambush.

This last year has been a bitch. And the only reason I have some semblance of sanity is because of these ppl. The people who matter...Happy Friendship Day, guys...couldnt have done it without you...

2006-07-28T20:06:00.000+05:30

Finally some good news in life. Got promoted. Now am officialy over-paid. Two years ago, I would've laughed if someone had shown me my current pay-cheque. The guys who talk about India loosing its competive advantage in off-shoring cos of rising wages have a bloody good point.Am not complaining though...have to make some "wise financial decisions" in the next few weeks. NOT looking forward to that.

And my pleas for "more challenging work" have not fallen on deaf ears. After going thru the agony of doing mostly grunt work and odd-jobs, Ive been given a rather challenging piece of work...among others involves working with start-ups like this...its kind of a steep learning curve for me...but i think i'll pass

Oh and ACE 2006 is on Sunday...been part of the amazing team which has made this happen...truly wonderful human beings...nice to know that the IT industry has some ppl like this ...

Life is good...finally

2006-07-24T18:19:00.000+05:30

Got this fwd some days ago. One of the best I've recd so far...almost makes me forgive the whole forward-sending community. Anyway this fwd is meant for one especially confused person in Chennai-mama apparently everyone is going thru this shit...so chill!!!

Being a twenty-something

It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are many things about yourself that you didn't know and may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met, and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you don't recognize is that they are realizing that too, and aren't really cold, catty, mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you.You look at wat ur studyin or ur job... and it is not even close to what you thought you would be doing, or maybe you are looking for a job and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and that scares you.Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and are constantly adding things to your list of what is acceptable and what isn't. One minute, you are insecure and then the next, secure.You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life, but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away, and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you. Or you lie in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough that you want to get to know better. Or maybe you love someone! but love someone else too and cannot figure out why you're doing this because you know that you aren't a bad person. Getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic. You go through the same emotions and questions over and over, and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision. You worry about loans, money, the future and making a life for yourself... and while winning the race would be great, right now you are scared just to be a contender!What you may not realize is that every one reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out. Its called "Quarter-life Crisis." nothing is constant......except change.Wats life without a few risks? keep playing the game..

2006-07-20T18:25:00.000+05:30

Can post. Cant see. Thought I was immune to the blogonazi's till yesterday. Thats 'cos my employers proxy server was in the US. Someone somewhere has grown a brain now and I have no access :((....this blog I guess is for my "NRI Audience" if any :))

2006-07-18T17:19:00.000+05:30

Completed one year with my employer today. All of us batch-mates went out for lunch. Surprised by the sheer ferocity of changes that have taken place since July 18 2005-two ppl had gotten married(to different ppl),two ppl moving to the Chennai office, two ppl quitting...more may join the exodus. With the market as hot as it is that should'nt be a surprise, really. But, it still feels kinda sad that the same faces wont be seen. Have to move on.

Personally, am pretty satisfied with the way things are going at work.Could've been slightly better...but hey am lucky to be here instead of some VLSI lab in Idaho. I remember sitting at Nungambakam Quicky's with four other equally dis-illusioned non-engineers and wondering where life was going to take us. Two years down the line, I still dont know. But atleast I have a job that pays and a roof over my head(however leaky it may be). I am in a profession where technical intution rather than knowledge per se is the key to success. Proabably the best fit for me. Hey that should count for something.

Sometimes our expectations of our future cloud the uncertainties of the past that got us here...I am in one of those moments...just need some perspective...that means a nice long vacation away from it all. Get some distance,some perspective and come back energized...oh and I mis Chennai like hell...even more when I know that I was given the choice of going there...argh!!! the kinda things you have to sacrifice for your career!!!! Sorry for the criblog...had to take it out somewhere...

2006-07-12T19:56:00.000+05:30

Hi, heard u were leaving to the us from anmol...all the best...sorry for all the troubles caused and words said...wish I could go back in time and redo everything...i cant...have to live with it.Hope I bump into you sometime in the next 100 years...fingers crossed...hope you would've forgiven me then...so long...kick some ass in the usa...Arun

What do you think? Sweet? Crisp? Gentle? Gross? Took me close to an hour and a couple of suttas to think it up! So much for "closure"...what part of not-talking-to-each-other-for-the-last-8 months is not "closure"?? Guess am reading too many vidheshi books!! But I enjoyed writing it.....gross, I know!

Talking about vidheshi books....the master is back....cant wait to get my hands on this whammer!!! this guy is the only English author whose books I TRULY look forward to...Also happens to be his first book after 9/11...ohhhhhh maama....cant wait...have placed an order on ndtvshopping...firstandseconds selling the hard-cover for 1350....no thanks...check out the blurb:

When British and American intelligence catch wind of a major Al Qaeda operation in the works, they are primed for action - but what can they do? They know nothing about the attack: the what, where or when. They have no sources in Al Qaeda, and it's impossible to plant someone. Impossible, unless ... The Afghan is Izmat Khan, a five-year prisoner of Guantanamo Bay and a former senior commander of the Taliban. The Afghan is also Colonel Mike Martin, a 25-year veteran of war zones around the world, a dark, lean man born and raised in Iraq. In an attempt to stave off disaster, the intelligence agencies will try to do what no one has ever done before - pass off a Westerner as an Arab among Arabs - pass off Martin as the trusted Khan. It will require extraordinary preparation, and then extraordinary luck, for nothing can truly prepare Martin for the dark and shifting world he is about to enter. Or for the terrible things he will find there ... "The Day of the Jackal", "The Dogs of War", "The Odessa File" - the books of Frederick Forsyth have helped define the international thriller as we know it today. Combining meticulous research with crisp narratives and plots as current as the headlines, Forsyth shows us the world as it is, in a way that few have ever been able to equal. And the world as it is today is a very scary place ...

Note to self: Dont even think of marriage as long as you get goosebumps after reading blurbs like this.

Grisham is also coming up with what looks to be a jab at the President's loving brother....hmmm...finally something to look forward to in life...

2006-07-06T18:29:00.000+05:30

Are you a an avid quizzer? No? A crappy one like me? No problemo....ACE 2006 is here...get your companies to loosen their purse strings a little bit! Hey, all for a good cause!

Ok I just realised that I'd make a crappy copy-writer. So check the official flyer below....mail me at arun_83[at]rediffmail.com if you think your company may be interested in either sending you to the quiz or in sponsoring the competition...

What is ACE 2006?
ACE 2006 is a battle among the best brains from India's top corporate houses. The Quiz is being conducted by J. Krishnamurthi, one of India's top-ranked quizzers and a key member of Quizerati, a team of avid quiz experts. The quiz offers participants a chance to pit their brains against the best, win attractive prizes and most importantly lend their support to a deserving cause. The proceeds received from this would go towards the welfare of needy students at Ramakrishna Upper Primary School at Yellammabanda, Kukatpally, Hyderabad.
ACE 2005 attracted about Thirty-Eight Teams from various companies in the twin cities and helped Asha raise around 2 lakh rupees, which was used towards providing mid day meals to over 240 children suffering from malnutrition at Ramakrishna School, Kukatpally.

How can you help?
You can also be a part of this noble endeavor and help us in following ways:
1. By Participating in the Quiz. You can send in teams for participation in the quiz.
The Registration Fee for Participation is as follows :
Rs 5000 for one team
Rs 4000 per team (if there are mutiple teams from your company)
Please refer to the attached doc for registration details
2. Being a sponsor for the event. Join hands with us by being one of the sponsors of the event. Please refer to the attached doc for Sponsorship Details.
For more details, please visit http://www.isb.edu/ACE2006/

ABOUT Asha
Asha was started in 1991 at the University of California, Berkley. Since then, both the cause and the organization have found support from individuals across the US and India. Asha has supported more than 385 different projects in India since its inception and currently has 66 chapters worldwide with more than 1000 active volunteers.For more details visit:
http://ashanet.org and http://ashanet.org/hyderabad

ABOUT THE ISB
The Indian School of Business evolved from a need for a globally top-ranked and distinctive business school in the Asian region dedicated to providing the best management education. The ISB's aspiration to groom tomorrow's leaders is grounded in the belief that leadership skills can be learnt and that successful leaders must take charge of their own development and growth to achieve their true potential. For more details visit:
http://isb.edu

I've got Mail

2006-07-03T18:14:00.000+05:30

"I will be on Vacation from Monday. Arun will open the bridge. He will be the SPOC for the BOM for the ID4 week. Will miss you all. Bye."

Dont understand this? Join the club. This is just a sane sample. What he was trying to say was that Arun will open the Conference Call bridge(not the Banjara Hills bridge as I had assumed). He is our Bakra for this week so he will be the Single Point of Contact for the Build Of Material(as opposed to some al-qaida plot).

Another game they play is 'Lets CC the Bakra'. Thats when you are sent the 43rd mail in a huge long chain of mails and asked, "Arun: What can you do about this?". This is usually when you start craping your pants cos there are some really Hot-shot names in the CC. You cant reply:"Exactly which part of this is my problem?".

This is when your Chennai-trained mind thinks-up imaginative responses:" I discussed this with Kishore today, under the circumstances we do not have any other options for you but Kishore feels that he could stabilise this area of work and will be ok to carry out the role for the 9 months. As your aware Sandeep is in charge of the PW workstream as a Leverageable service and could use Shatanu to assist in the matter of moving this are of business to be less reliant on individuals and more reliant on standards, processes & systems to produce successful proposals. " It basically means:"Exactly which part of this is my problem?".

Another game played is 'Zap 'em with Attachment'.

"Find below the specs. Need your response immdly." Below I find a 6 MB Excel sheet which has its ass plastered from head to toe with numbers...I mean only numbers....nothing more...not even one fucking alphabet!! My response:"?????".

Sender's response:"Sorry thought you were someone else bye".Adapaavigalaa!! Ethana peru da ippudi?? If I'd been a lil more industrious I would've actually started working on those numbers!! Near-miss.

Its not good enough to just give earnings-warning every quarter. People need to know where all that money is going....

2006-06-21T12:16:00.000+05:30

A brilliant piece of prose on News Today. About Chennai.

"....When everyone's favorite pastime was chanting mantras and learning to play the veena. When a visit to a temple preceded any activity of the day and an outing meant a time to spend with the family on the beach or at the park. When women graciously performed household chores in their dainty Kancheepuram sarees while children boisterously played in their colourful pavadais and shorts. When snack meant uppma and a glass of buttermilk. But now things have changed dramatically. Chennai is slowly losing its true identity to modernization and western mentality. "

Mantras?? Veenas?? When the heck was that?? Ive been there from 1983...dont know a mantra/never seen a veena(not if you include that History teacher in 10th).

"...'There was a time when directions were given based on the number of temple towers on the way. Now, unless we go close to a temple, we don't get to see its gopuram,' says Ram Gopal, a non-resident Indian, based in Connecticut, USA. "

Ya sure...that was a time when you had to go to "Connecticut,USA" to find decent work. The other option was to work in the PWD dept. till hell freezes over!! When you had to watch Oliyum Oliyum on Friday and then go to sleep!! Golden Era, indeed!!

"...Dosas are replaced with pizzas, idly with burgers and murukku with french fries. Restaurants offering a variety of international cuisines have given way to pastas and stew, instead of sambar and vadakari. Gone are those days when the sumptuous pair of masala dosa and Kumbakonam degree coffee was available in every corner, when idly can be had all day through accompanied by a wide variety of chutneys. 'I am surprised to note that bhavans, that use to serve only typical south Indian dishes, now offers pizzas and french fries too. Not to mention, a wide variety of burgers,' says Pramila, a British national of Indian origin."

NRI's, a simple request:DONT COME BACK! And even if you did, please dont give interviews.It only gets worse....

"To the young people of Chennai, dressing in western clothing may be cool, but according to Padma and Mohan, a couple who have lived in Canada for more than a decade, it is disheartening to see young women wearing skimpy skirts and sleeveless shirts. 'It's just not in our culture to flaunt the female body', they pointed out. Even the usual elegance in saree is lost when it is worn with spaghetti straps and haltered backless blouses, the wife commented. "

Now we know that these are NRI's-who-dint-get-any!!!

"What happened to the ties that use to bind families together? The ties that use to gather them all in the house for an evening puja after the daughter comes from her bharatnatyam class and the son arrives from his carnatic music session with the master. "

Hmmmmm.....

The article only illustrates the NRItis disease that has been afflicting our cities in the last few years....it takes a lot of funny forms--"you ppl have cell-phones???", "oh that phone is not analog *grin*"," oh you've been to a KFC??"...or it can take the form of crappy career advice(however well-meaning) that is out of place in the Indian context!!!

I have a cousin and a bunch of friends in the US now, and all of them want to come back. My advice to all of them:Dont be like this when you grow-up!!!

2006-06-05T14:47:00.000+05:30

Hello ppl...the deafening silence on the blog was not without reason. Me and a couple of my friends bought some champagne, some "white substance", mixed the two of them and drank it. Ofcourse, this caused some nausea and a few deaths on the side. Heck, you know what the most interesting sub-story in this whole mess is? Apollo Hospitals' Narco-analysis-cover-up-muck-up.Apparently they dint put a unit next to the quantity of narc-substance. Hmmm that reminds me of my rather glorious past, studying physics and chemistry in high-school. I was always one of those 'Apollo Hospitals Doctor type' who ALWAYS forgot to put the unit-gram,mg,kg-next to the quantity being measured. Pleasantly surprised to know that some of the "merit" docs and I share the same malaise.

In other news ,Ive been elected as a Vice-President in my company. Naah, not VP-Corporate Affairs, but VP-Education at the company chapter of Toastmaster's International-a rag-tag grouping of wanna-be Presidents and Vice-Presidents. Election process was a sham in itself-you cant beat a Dravidian in any election. Taking a cue from Big-daddy, I promised 10hrs of work every week for the club. Hehehehe....they bought it!!!

But seriously, I am looking to develop the chapter into one of the better ones in Hyderabad. Apparently Infy Toastmasters was a failure. Not surprising considering that they were all IT Types. It is kinda tough minding a group of 30 over-grown,over-fed IT Types all of whom suffer from a healthy dose of ageism(ask me), xenophobia(ask me) and sexism(ask the only female member of the club).

Apart from the "leadership" opportunity(and a bullet point on the resume-which is what all of this is about, really), I am seriously looking to improve my communication skills. I would give myself a 7 on 10. Just have to move from "good to great"...whatever that means.

So if you are a Toastmaster or know someone who knows someone who slept with a Toastmaster, then drop a line. Cos as the guy who is supposed to "design and co-ordinate" the curriculum, I know next to nothing about this!!!

2006-05-22T17:27:00.000+05:30

Nothing to blog about. Life is getting progressively suckier. Days are filled with meaning-less conference calls and meetings that dont achieve anything. Nights are filled with sutta and phone conversations that dont lead anywhere. Whoever said that mid-20's were the best time to be alive, lied. That was a sadist joke perpetrated on teens! Cant beleive that this is the life I wanted for myself this time last year.

Btw, has anyone heard of Appraisals on a Sunday?? I was waiting for MTV Bakra to come out. Nice discussion though. "Service Vending Machine"(credit:ICC) was very fair. Got a 3 rating. Three stands for " you dint set anything on fire...but you did well....so here you go eat one Parle-G....and oh you are eligible for a raise...". I need the money though...desperately....so its ok. Cant help but regret a year wasted writing PD's that no one ever read.

Oh and I have my first "Mock Test" on Sunday. Mock is a good way to describe it. That's exactly what it does to me. Cant remember being so un-prepared for anything.

Am collecting the pieces, writing the mails, doing the drills....all in the solemn hope that tomorrow will be a better day. Thats all a man can do. Hope.

2006-05-16T17:18:00.000+05:30

Well the Reservation debate dint leave 'Cyber Residency' alone. Fierce debate yesterday. A neighbour almost cried! We were throwing bottles at each other...waking everyone up at 2'o clock in the morning!! Funny thing was that all four of us were OBC-Tamilians!!! If we cant agree with each other then I have no hope for the "concensus" that Arjun Singh talks about. All of us agreed on one thing-North Indian OBC politicians have consistently and criminally failed their people. For way too long. We had Kamaraj, Anna,MGR, heck even MK who never neglected PRIMARY EDUCATION. Reservation was NEVER the only panacea for TN.

As Bruno says eleoquently, it created a generation of clerks, govt.servants and teachers who created a more equitable society. My own family is a good example. Both my grand-fathers got into the Railways because of reservation. They spawned the next generation of 5 professionals on both sides. I can proudly say that none of the grand-children have used reservation to enter college. But the same cannot be said of a North-Indian OBC. They were hardly exposed to the mid-day meal schemes and the robust educational system that we were exposed to.

My fear is that, having failed in Primary Education, these Laloo/Mulayam types will see Reservation as a panacea for all their people's problems. Like a Magic Bullet. And thats a crime against North-Indian OBC's. Because, as this article shows, given a good Primary Education along with a generation of Reservation, OBC's can compete and even beat FC's.

Not that TN hasnt made any mistakes at all. As this article says, we have to have a re-look at the reservation system in TN. If we can do that we would've successfully concluded one of the most daring and innovative social-engineering program in the world. And hope that in the process those dumb schmuck North-Indian leaders learn a thing or two from the "Madrasis"

2006-05-11T14:12:00.000+05:30

Well, the people have spoken. Get ready. For endless visits from "working-commitee members" who dont know a word of Tamil. For authority with a mix of senility. For un-ceasing waves of propaganda TV. Cheaper-crappy-propaganda-news-papers. For a more compromised position on Cauvery.For some more Rajini-Khushboo-Bashing. For a victory for sepratisits in a beautiful country below us.For big-mummy in jail. A new-CM after 2 years(??). For a more sizzling media-stock from a company in Chennai........

Ah well...am I sounding too pessimistic? All of us make the mistake of over-estimating the influence of the polity on civil-society in TN. Mummy ran one of the crappiest, most corrupt regimes from 91-96....what happened to us?? Nothing.

The Digs congress rep I can deal with. Rajini prob deserved what he got.......But SUN TV-I CANNOT DEAL WITH!!

2006-05-08T16:36:00.000+05:30

Just back after a fiery 'election debate' with Mr. Ice Coffee(who has been screwing my life in his sorry excuse of a blog). He is a feverent DMK supporter. I think he is a fool. He thinks even worse of me. Our colleagues think we are a bunch of morons, discussing politics in the middle of the floor in Tamil. Mr. ICC came into the office today with a 'murasu', trumpetting how he got "reports" from chennai that said that DMK was going to sweep the polls. A close buddy in Chennai tells me how he got "reports" from the "deep south"(not Alabama, more like Tiruchi) which say that Amma is going to sweep the polls. I am not willing to beleive either of them...all I know is that its going to be too close for comfort...

But these things do point to a new breed of ppl that seem to be inhabiting our companies these days--The 'Lok Paritran types'. You can find them all around you-in cubicles, reading LP forwards, sending them to a hundred ppl they dont even know, posting them on company discussion boards, fiercely debating the evils of reservations("...this country is going to the dogs da macha..."), hijacking Orkut discussion boards with fiery quotes from US Army recruitment.

I caught up with one such person recently, lets call her 'Gult Girl'.
Gult Girl:"Hey Arun, are you going to Chennai?".
Me:"Hmm..No...why?".
Gult Girl:"You have to go there and vote yaar...for that Lok Adalat party...they are all from IIT...they are sooo nice...".

No she wasnt talking about the People's court. She was just being a 'Lok Paritran type'--utterly clueless, facile and extremely righteous! No am not sooo pessimistic about LP...just that I have a problem with righteous-yet-unproven-people. OK I read their web-site. And like any normal human-being I had some problem understanding what,"..the continuum of instinct or elements of nature that take different shades, and gets categorized as different elements, and in fragmented understanding, leads to the concept of reconciliation of conflicting tendencies rather than perfection of balance." meant. They lost me at "continuum"...man WTF is a "continuum"?? Why such pretension?? If they wanted to sound intelligent, they failed.

To be fair to them we have to reserve judgment till 2011. Lets see if they stick around till then. Lets see if they can really "do something for the people". Till then am with Amma.

2006-05-04T14:33:00.000+05:30

'The President' was here. All-hands meeting. Bloody-good presentation. One of the best Ive ever seen. Then the fun begins. Open-house. Free-for-all-question-session. Question Number 1:"Saar, the food in our canteen is not good...in the beginning the vendor was good...now he has no motivation...I have a solution, lets introduce a second vendor...competition will increase quality.....". You should've seen the look on 'President's face. For god's sake, how bout a segue question?? I mean he was talking about strategy,global forces,economy,backlash in the US....how bout a fucking segue, man???? Sometimes I cant hate my heritage enough! Sometimes I wish I'd taken the red-pill and left the shores!!!

Oh the meeting was declared a great success. After which all of us despersed for...you guessed it...high-tea and snacks...what else? Man I ABSOLUTELY NEED to move on in life!!!!

2006-04-27T17:39:00.000+05:30

Been a wee bit busy with this. Never been challenged like this before. Will blog when I come back to senses...Btw, the legions of frustrated, young incorporates seem to be growing by the day..check out Ice-cold-coffee...again colleague,good f(r)iend,drinking partner... heck my only achievement here so far has been making bloggers out of innocent young engineers...we also have Katherine for company...

Oh and ppl be good...use GoodSearch for getting all those shakeela pics...all for a good cause...

2006-04-24T18:28:00.000+05:30

Amazing how low people can stoop for 15mins of glory. Was reading How Opal Mehta Got Kissed, Got Wild and Got a Life. Young author. Tamilian. NRI. Harvard. Female. Things that almost always cause an antenna to go up in my head(with deleterious consequences most of the time). Was going to post a full-fledged review of how supremely dis-appointed I was of these 'Chethan Bhagat types' who cant really think beyond IIT or Harvard. Or how I thought she wasnt worth the Millions publishers were willing to pay.

Then Woosh-Kabolie...I see this link from Sambhar Mafia!! Man I am supremely dis-appointed. Writing a bad novel is one thing. Plagiarising it completely another!! Did she think that ppl wouldnt find out?? And its not even a Dan-Brown type 'Concept Borrowing', its line-by-line robbery. Kinda reminds me of DSP lab. But we had enough common-sense to atleast have a pretense of originality.

All this begs a lotta questions...How the heck did she get into Harvard?? How did she con Time-Warner, the publisher?? Is this the end of Female Indian Writing talent?? Nooooooooooooo. Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you Katherine!!! F(r)iend, colleague,drinking-partner...my only hope in a company which beleives in hiring morons and giving them incentives!!! The great white hope of Indian female writing. Ok ok she paid me to write all that...and i got a lil emotional...but this is one crazy-ass mallu we are dealing with...so expect some good writing...

2006-04-17T15:06:00.000+05:30

Back to Work. Nice Vacation. Though Ive never looked forward to salary-day as much I am doing now. But it was nice, bonding with all the cousins and friends. Saw two of the crappiest Tamil movies Ive ever seen-Mercury Pookal and Thirutu Payalae. Do us all a favour-dont watch these movies. This way, hopefully, the Producers would back-off from making movies like this.

Went to the newly-opened Citi-centre in Chennai. Reminded me of Ibn-Batuta in Dubai. Good start-they only have Lifestyle and Landmark in place-but has a long way to go before it catches up with Forum or even Hyderabad Central. But it was refreshingly different from Spencers ,which is nothing more than an air-conditioned Moore market. Hopefully this is just a start to the mall-scene in Chennai. I had a more pop-sociology based post in mind, comparing the malls in Hyd and Chennai...damn too lazy...

2006-04-12T19:19:00.000+05:30

In chennai. Home sweet home. A series of bad days culminating in one really bad day. Buried a grand-parent. Grief. And all the hypocricy that comes with it. Feel pig-tired. A man should'nt feel this tired.Ever. Only upside is that I'll be here till monday. Have some time for contemplation. Not grief...was never THAT close to him....but quiet contemplation/rumination...In a perverse way, this was proabably "good" for me?? How sick am I??

2006-04-10T16:27:00.000+05:30

Made my TV Debut. A program called 'Naveena'. On a channel named TV9(stop laughing, its pretty famous in Hyderabad...well almost famous). Now I know why ppl say shit on television. The journo came to me, said she had "some questions on 2 or 3 topics" and asked me whether I am ok with being on TV.Am I ok? Ofcourse am ok!!! Only when she asked,"Do men gossip more than women?" I was speechless !! Mind just blanked out!!! I still dont know what I said. It airs at 2.30 two days from now!! Go and catch me on TV ppl!!! This may just be the beginning of a brilliant show-biz career!!!

2006-04-05T16:25:00.000+05:30

Frustating day @ work. Dont you just love it when ppl who were sleeping for months wake up suddenly...am counting the minutes to weekend...waiting for "Mr. Aravind Rajendran, Test Engineer, Tessolve India" to come. Dont you just love ppl's signature in mails...someone you called "Bumulu"in college has suddenly become "Avinash Rajan, Programmer Analyst, Satyam"...hmmmm....

Last time the 3 of us were together outside Chennai was in Bangalore. Have some nice memories of that trip. That was prob. my last trip to Bangy. Arvind is quitting and leaving to good old chennai. Was actually hoping to go there once before he left...you have to admit, the city has a charm!! Started this post wanting to post a comparison of Chennai vs. Bangalore vs. Hyderabad....too lazy. That post has to wait till tomorrow...

2006-04-03T16:01:00.000+05:30

Saw 'V for Vendetta'. Good watch. Nothing great. Only one question:Why do they hate Dick Cheney so much? So much that there always has to be a redundant 'Deputy Villain' whose only job is to be more villainous than the Villain. Biggest joke of the movie: Britain is the sole surviving super-power after the Iraq war. In your dreams, bitch...In your dreams!

That is the only notable English Release this season in Hyderabad!! No Broke-Back mountain, no Crash,no Jarhead...competing with Bangalore my ass!! Chennai has a better scene for gods sake. They've started Salsa classes here though. Just that there is a slight clash of schedules. Those who know me would proabably be laughing at this. To you I say one thing:People change. People reduce weight. Now I am 2 kgs BELOW recommended weight, bitches!!!!! Salsa is definitely a long-term target...though I dont see how I'll make it in the near-future.

There is a serious problem with Hyderabad in this regard. If you are not a pub-hopping-disco-going-punk(which I am not) then there is an amazing lack of things to do. Ive been here for 9 months and I can safely say that I have been to all the places that this city has to offer. Even a pub or two. That was funny. You can easily find a bunch of Tamilians in a pub...we are usually the most happiest guys there. We are so happy we made it inside, we make the place inhabitable for the rest of the crowd.

Hmmm, three paragraphs to describe my entire social life....what a sorry ass I am!!

2006-03-29T15:44:00.001+05:30

My roomies think I am a freak. They laugh at me when I come home EVERY night. Actually I dint help my case that much. Ok there was this 'lock-out incident' one night. I locked-up my roomie Senthil and went out for Dinner. He tried calling me up but I dint receive any call. He kept repeating the phrase "@#$%$#@#" over and over again after I came back. Hey listen it was a genuine mistake. I REALLY forgot he was inside. Though the 5-min chat I had with him before I went out dint help my case that much!

And there was the 'snooze-button incident'. I am one of those ppl who have the same alarm-tone as the ring-tone. About a week back my burly yet robust 2600 buzzed me at 7 as usual. According to eye-witness accounts, I woke-up, hit the snooze button and said "Hello". Then they tell me that I proceeded to curse the crank-call-giver and went back to sleep. The killer, they say, is that I repeated the process after 10 mins!

My only defence is that work is getting to me. I am NOT A FREAK!!!

2006-03-27T21:01:00.000+05:30

Folks left. They had a nice time. I hope. Went to Ramoji Film City. An enormous waste of money and waste-land. All because the Gults felt that they were being short-changed by the Tamil Film Industry. Why does everybody hate us? We realized, a bit late, that the youngest member of the family had out-grown stunt-shows 5 years back. Also went to "Magnificent Desolation", a movie made for I-Max theatares. And it screams "We just made this movie so that you get awed by Imax, so forget story/screenplay and shut the fuck up" at you! Everytime I see a movie in I-max I end up feeling cheated. 150 bucks for a 45 min movie? Agreed the 3-d glasses were cool and the Images are rather good...but I just feel cheated. Some months back Raja wanted his money's worth so he tried to grab the 3-d image of the leading lady of a dinosour movie we had gone to.

The week-end only re-inforced what Ive been thinking: Am gonna stick to Hyderabad. Come what may. They have to fire me to make me go to Chennai!!!

And now let me get back to work. Am supposed to make a presentation on this. To two guys who have been described as "masters" on the field. And they use the F-word like it was their birth right!!! And they call me "bachhaa"!!! And I dont have a clue what ITIL is!!! This is what I call a Perfect Storm!!!!

2006-03-24T12:53:00.000+05:30

Ive got Visitors in the next few Weeks. Family dropping in tomorrow. That only means one thing: Clean,Clean andClean! Throw out all the Beer bottles we've been accumalating for the past 3 months, along with the strategically placed lighters, then get to the books,CD's and magazines...back-breaking work ahead today!

Aravind is coming 2 weeks after that. Three of the biggest bitchers of my batch are getting together...its going to be one long,huge bitching session...I presume about the women in our lives, or the women who quit our lives...

Nice timing actually....desperately need some time off....

2006-03-23T13:28:00.000+05:30

You can never comprehend some ppl. 'V' quit. I thought the norm these days was to atleast let your team-mates know that you are going. Atleast one freaking mail for gods sake! Especially 'V'. I kinda looked upto this guy-serious fundoo he was-IIML,doing Business Dev. work here...he was one heckuva guy. I still treasure the 5-day training I went thru with him. Taught me a lot about the sub-segment I am working in.

Chalo, I guess some ppl are like that! Hopefully this time next year I'll be writing my Fare-well mail. Not that I dont like my present employer. They've been nice to me. Too nice. And my present job is something I am made for. But when you are 22 in India 2006, the temptations are so high! You are looking for a bigger challenge...a bigger canvas...and a IT Company is NOT the place to look for a challenge!

2006-03-21T14:50:00.000+05:30

Quit Smoking. Just as sudden as it started.

2006-03-20T13:25:00.000+05:30

Well the Great news simply keeps rolling-in. 'Naga girl', refered to in this post, is aparently expecting a B-A-B-Y!!! That'll be the 2001 Batch's first Baby. ECE finally wins something!! Man that is so 1990's...21 year-old girl gets married to "professionaly-settled" NRI, goes to Australia,has a baby!!!What happens to you, mom?? You cant work for the next 2 years atleast. You dont have any skills. You are so royally dependent on hubby dear. Which is not such a bad thing.

But it is such a turn-off for me! In the last one year I've cultivated a visceral hate for these "home-makers". Agreed, in the '80's and '90's you were better off getting married to these NRI-types and moving to Idaho. There was nothing back here for an urban-educated woman that could hold her back from Idaho. But its 2006 %^&*#. "You coulda had class. You coulda been a contender. You coulda been somebody."

Not that I am having any success with the professional,"non-homemaker" types. Got dumped by one 'PSBB-type' and got snubbed by another. All in the space of the last six-months. Man, Ive gotta be a real feminist to hold on to my views. Though anything is infinitely better than ppl like 'Naga girl'.

Cant imagine going down that way. The pursuit for the perfect girl is still very much on. Once in a while though, I shift to my slightly older colleagues' cubicle; to browse TamilMatrimony.com. Nothing says,"I am a looser" better than spending half a day at this portal. I undergo this torture just to remind myself that I am about 5 years away from 'Naga Girl'. Perfect girl, where art thou??

2006-03-16T18:23:00.000+05:30

Election season is heating-up in TN. And like everything else on earth I have an opinion on it. If you are a long-time follower of this blog, then you know where I stand: 2 feet behind Amma. Like a Rock. But some of you are new here so I'll re-state:2 feet behind Amma. Like a Rock.

If you are naive enough to think that elections in TN have anything to do with policies or positions, then snap out of it. They once were.Not any more.Now its all about the persona/charisma of the woman(or very old man) who is leading one of the Dravidian Parties. Period.

There isnt much to differentiate between the two parties. You have one party with the 'A' which wants to make TN the No.1 state in the country. And you have a party without the 'A' which wants to make TN the No. 1 state in the country. No conflict of Interest on Homosexuality/Devolution/Govt. Spending/Health care/Or any of those issues which normal ppl fight elections over. You'll be hard-pressed to differentiate between the manifestos of the two parties.

And thats a sad thing. Because the Dravidian Movement, atleast the original version of it, is more than a political movement. It defines a whole generation of people. It creates a sense of identity. And if I can exaggerate, it emancipates. It gives you the confidence to consider yourself better than every other species on the planet. When a 'Hindian' accuses you of not knowing Hindi, it gives you the confidence to say,"You dint get employed 'cos of your Hindi skills, did you? And you can thank us later for making you stick to English!". Yeah, many ppl of my generation forget the greatest contribution made by the Dravidian movement: English. Without the two-language policy we'd be giving serious competition to Ghana in the poverty index.

And thats what makes me puke when I see ppl like Vaiko. If Vaiko is the future of Dravidian politics, as some ppl claim, then things are really getting heady. And thats where Amma comes in.No dynastic politics(mostly cos there is no dynasty). And therefore my BP doesnt increase like when I see Stalin or Maran. No liquor lobby. No SUN TV(Jaya TV is such a joke that it doesnt count). No power centres. No pandering to every tiny-nano-caste interest. Just a ruthless lady and Absolute Power.

I think she'll make it. By a wafer thin margin. But I hope she makes it.

2006-03-16T11:06:00.000+05:30

Just when I thought I'd seen it all this city throws up more surprises. I saw a Green dog on my way to work today. Yeah a Green Dog. I can very well understand if a 33-year old,US-Educated Software Engg. throws half a Kilo of Pink Holi powder at me. But why the dog?? That too Green?? My eyes almost popped out. Anyway Happy Holi to everyone. I hope all of you threw colours at each other, had your bath, came out, only to find your friend holding a handful of Pink powder and a lecherous grin.

2006-03-13T17:17:00.000+05:30

Just another boring Monday. Except I saw a man die today. A motor-cycle-rider. No Helmet. Rash driving. Lousy road.Took him to the hospital. Where I saw the biggest in-humanity of my life--an hospital which wont use its own ambulance to ferry a man about to die. They called the Govt. sponsored ambulance service...god bless the AP Govt.

They've taken "the patient" to Osmania University, where I hope there are saner people. I dont think he'll make it. Whatever his name was. The Bastard had all of 3 bruises in his body. The more fatal blow to the head could've been prevented if he had worn a helmet.

2006-03-09T15:36:00.000+05:30

My sis is writing her 12th Board Exams. The whole family is on tenterhooks. Prayer,coffee,more prayer,occasional emotional outbursts,"I dont know what I want to do in Life, ok!!!", more prayer, more coffee....its been one big emotional roller-coaster ride. I tried giving her the same advice that everyone gave me when I was 17-"It aint gonna make one inch of a difference, kid!!". That usually gets a series of sisterly expletives as response.

Cant blame her though. I reacted the same way. Fact is, if you are a 17 year old, then this is the biggest event of your life so far. A pathway to engineering/medicine, a better life...basically success. Atleast that is the perception of an average 17 year old.

Frankly, can one exam shape your destiny?? It certainly dint shape mine. And I am pretty damn sure that most of my friends feel the same way. Life is too freaking complicated(as I am finding out) to be decided by one exam.

This phase is also re-opening some old wounds. Damn I still remember my Maths exam(lets just say that for once the Lion cried!). Damn I wish I could go back and tell that kid that everything turned out alright. Nobody died. Ofcourse, I'll also tell him to polish his Volume Integral Skills :))

Links

2006-03-07T17:58:00.000+05:30

I visit this blog. Thats all I want to say. Yes, I admit it. I give up. He's funny. He's ruthless. And he is NOT boring(atleast not as much as some of the famous bloggers/cartlel members). And his puke-fests' rock!

So does this blog. A smart,ruthless onion-peeling of the cable news channels. Hmmm...is this the same country which saw DD News 3 times a day, had safe-sex and slept at 9 PM?? Not anymore. Check out this alleged mail from Rajdeep Sardesai to his staff. Its war out there.

A very good idea. Got one junk response. Total BS. But a very good idea if they can rope in the right experts.

One more reason why ET/TOI should be banned like the Satanic Verses...they are making us dumb!!!!!

Update:-Oh and there is a freeaking ice-storm here in Hyderabad!!! Yeah I dint beleive it till Ms. LP courageously took an ice sample from the office corridor and handed it over to me. Stupid girl. Crazy city...Ice in the Deccan Plateau??? Fuck...GLOBAL WARMING IS TRUE!!!!!!!!!1

2006-03-06T14:19:00.000+05:30

In a dilemma now. Go back home or stay in a strange-city. Worthy arguments can be made on both sides. Home is where my heart is. Plus I dont have to worry about un-clean toilet seats and loud music. It also means that I'll be a prisoner for the forseeable future--no 2AM walks in the by-lanes of Madhapur, no sutta breaks whenever I want, no FTV and Blenders Pride at 3AM. Plus am doing fairly well for myself professionally. Not getting them 100M$ contracts but not being un-noticed either.

Only incentive I can think of is that my 'Man Friday' has promised that he'll be there for me in June. Man has some crazy plans, none of which I plan to aid. Even if I take the bait, there is no guarnantee that he wont be spending all his waking hours with his girl-friend. Have to choose self-interest here I think :))

Plus the "enthu-guy" that I am, ive made a 100 commitments in Hyder's city...some of which will be bloggable in the near future I hope.

A foot note about Hyderabad. If there is one city in South India that can be defined as 'somewhere near global standards' then this is it. Anyone from any part of the globe* can come here set-up base and feel at home. Now thats one thing you CANNOT say about Bangalore or my promised land. No I dont have any plans of settling here, though Ive thought about it once or twice. Too much of a Chennai boy to settle down anywhere outside the BlueStar area.

* Riders include a certain North-American Country and a Scandinavian Country. That too only in the Old-City area.

2006-03-02T14:16:00.000+05:30

Feel really bad about whats going-on in Sathyabama, my alma-mater. Got about 20 forwards about "Eye Witness Accounts" on whats going on. From what I can gather all the labs except the CS and Chemistry ones have been broken, the Indian Bank ATM has been vandalised(money may have been stolen), some of the "squad members"(read management's goons) have been injured, almost all windows have been broken. College has been closed until further notice.

Some reports suggest that some IT Heavy-weight may have been conducting a training program during the strike. Yeah right, that shld send a message to NASSCOM. Amazing mob-mentality. They just shot themselves in the foot! Amazing how 14 years of formal education doesnt seem to have any impact on certain people. No, their degree hasnt been de-recognized. The matter is sub-judice. The bone of contention is not even a question of recognition, it is merely a question of who has the bigger dick. The AICTE wants to have full control over ALL technical insti's in the country. The Deemed Univ's dont think so. They say UGC control is good enough. The matter is sub-judice...why dint they wait for the order!!!!

In this whole Student Vs. Management struggle lets not forget the real-villain--AICTE. Why in the name of god would they want to issue ads in National newspapers about Deemed Univ's when the matter is still under contention. What effect did they think this would have on students?? Did they think that a bunch of 20year-olds whose whole future is on the line will just read thru the ad and keep quite?? There is a certain amount of mischief involved in this whole episode.

At the end of the day a beautiful system(as in Pvt colleges in TN) which has been one of the biggest feeders to the Indian IT Boom has been strangled to death.

Felt terrible to read thru all those forwards that juniors sent...Library, Admin block, first years block, Electronics lab, Seminar hall...was there once...memories now...destroyed forever.

2006-03-01T14:18:00.000+05:30

Two Great mystries of Cricket that have always confounded me...
If you are gonna spell him "Mcrath" why do you call him "Mcraaa"...why not just spell him "Mcraa" or even "Mcraw" of Tata-Mcraw Hil fame...

And if you spell him as "Warne" why do you call him "Warn"...why not drop the 'e'...

Hmmm...what more can we expect from a Nation of ex-Convicts...

2006-02-27T17:03:00.000+05:30

Saw 'Memoirs Of a Geisha'. Not as bad as I thought it would be. Girl gets sold,becomes a prostitute(or a Geisha if you are a lil squeamish). Girl competes with other Geisha to win the affection of 'The Chairman'. Girl sells her virginity in an auction. Girl sleeps with American Colonel to get lucrative contracts for 'The Chairman'. Girl finally gets Chairman. Ok am trying to make it sound a lil more raunchy than it really is. Actually it was surprisingly refreshing...not as dark as Balu Mahendra/Selvaragavan would make it. If the story of a prostitute can be told in a more positive way then I would be really surprised.

If only I could get thru the shear sickness of the concept of a Geisha. Prostitution sucks by itself. To me guys who solicit prostitutes are somewhere between a cockroach and Amar Singh. But this ritualized-prostitution takes it to a new level. If you are gonna pay money and fuck then just pay and fuck. Why this ritualism and tradition and art and respect??

But I finally came to know why the Japs lost WW2. Geisha's customers included two Genenrals, a baron, a "Chairman", his business partner, and a doctor among others. Now you know. When the rest of the world was bombing them ,these guys were screwing around. But the movie was interesting enough to make me buy a copy of 'Kafka on The Shore'. Japan here I come.

Chew on this

2006-02-20T16:45:00.000+05:30

Got this from the intra-net. Written by our ex-MD.Worth a read.Especially if you work in a IT Behemoth.

Employees need to understand that we offer a long term career to employees. Employees need to have a career focus and not month to month focus on what they are making with us, what somebody else is making and what they can make elsewhere. We have many employees who joined us at a very low salary three years ago when we were primarily hiring from Indore and the salaries were low. These employees have increased their salaries manyfold (4 to 5 times and even more in some cases) in the last three years. They have not complained to us about their salaries, they have done an excellent job and we, on our own without their having to ask us, have taken care of them.

These people will be the future leaders of *****. Employees need to focus on good performance, loyalty and a career commitment to ******. We, in turn, will make sure that they are trained, promoted and get what they deserve. Talk to people who have been with us three years and are performing well and find out from them how we have treated them. The key for employees is to concentrate on performance.

I think I told you the story about TCS. When I worked for TCS, there were 5 PhDs from top universities of USA such as MIT, Wharton, etc. and many other very bright people. TCS' current CEO was a lowly field engineer fixing Burroughs machines at that time (TCS was selling Burroughs computers in India). While all the bright people left to go on to greener pastures, Ramadorai stayed on working hard and being loyal. Today he is TCS CEO making more money than all who left in search of greener pastures. Mahalingam was a chartered accountant hired to do some management consulting work. Today, he is an Executive Vice President of TCS, managing more than 2,000 people in Chennai. Nirmal Jain, a long term employee was transferred to Tata Infotech as the CEO. Loyalty and commitment to your company pays off.

Hmmm....something to chew on a boring Monday Evening. Oh and for the record the guy who wrote this is one amazing piece of work-Mckinsey,Wharton,IIM...you name it he's done it. As I said, something to chew on.

2006-02-16T16:15:00.000+05:30

During my recent trip to Chennai I was bugging my sis for her 9th and 10th std. books(to be used for my week-end pursuits--life!). As we were rummaging thru her books I found an incredible piece of family treasure-the "NTSE Scholar's Exam Guide-By some NorthIndian Dude". The first page had a bold scribbling,"Flying Officer Jaideep". Jaideep of course is my elder cousin. But I remember getting it from his younger brother CP. Of course, I promptly gave it to my sister when she entered 10th class. Oh let me answer the obvious question-Number of NTSE scholars in the Family?None. I guess we are a family of wannabe-scholars.

Am being too harsh."Flying Officer Jaideep" is now Squadron Leader Jaideep,flying daily in the face of hostile enemy fire and natural constraints;or atleast thats what he claims. And the rest of us turned out alright I guess. But still we are not scholars.I guess I'll give the book to Jaideep's son...but if what they say about genetics is true then...

2006-02-14T17:21:00.000+05:30

One more V-day.Same shit, different year. You know what the most annoying thing about V-day's are? Single men! Yes, you heard that right. "So wassup dude...What are you doing for V-day??". Both of us know that I am going to work like a dog, go home and sleep. Yet he gets a perverse pleasure in seeing my expression. I seriously contemplated calling 'her'. Gave up after re-calling the last conversation we had("!*&^%" and "*%&()" came to mind). Heck she proabably has an 'official-date'. Thats the new BS that corporate HR dept.'s are coming up with. You have to register your name in the reception,guy names will be swapped with girl names,guy and girl will be informed,guy or girl can send a rose if they like each other. Thanks. I am not THAT desperate.

Adding to all this is the thin possibility that some of my close friends may get hitched. Trust me, there's only one thing worse than being alone on V-day. So I am keepin my fingers crossed and praying very hard.

Links

2006-02-09T12:36:00.000+05:30

Techies to go up on immigrant list?? Somebody forgot to tell the French that even if we had to immigrate, we wouldnt choose a dumb-fuck place like France. No Thank You. Nennappu thaan polappa kedukudhu....

Deserves a mention... though I can think of a 100 things for guys...hmmm, just cant get around to blogging it though....

This issue confounds me. Would I back-stab my dad? Proabably not. But what if it was about the CM-seat? Cant answer that one...very tough one...
But this is pretty slam-dunk...if it was between my sister and 65,000 crores worth of business....then you are going down sister, you are going down in China-town...

I too like Obama,he's got something,he really has got something...and like all things charismatic you cant put your finger on it...check this out...

And now a special gift to my good friends who read this blog.

2006-02-03T15:02:00.001+05:30

Been spending most of my free-time here. American Late Night comedy is one of my fav things on TV. CNN used to run a segment of 'The Daily Show' till Maran and his cronies cut-off our cable. CNBC also used to run Leno. Fortunately now that I have high-speed broadband I can catch-up on all the stuff that I miss on TV. Check-out 'The Chappelle Show'(NOT for office viewing-be warned!) and 'The Colbert Report'. I identify very much with Colbert 'cos he reminds me of a charecter in my family. Colbert tries to be the 'insider'--openly supports Bush and the Republicans. But thats where his humour stems from--irony--even a die-hard supporter can make Bush look like a fool.

He tries to be Jon Stewart's counter-foil. Jon is the Jewish-Lib-dem who exudes a visceral hate for Bush. Its all fairly non-partisan--they all agree on who the enemy is. Sometimes I look at it and feel sad that there is no Indian equivalent. Shekhar Suman used to do a fairly good job...got into touble with Sikhs for "too many Sikh Jokes". I guess we dont deserve good comedy shows...with ppl like Ramdoss and Uma Bharti, how can you expect a good satire show?

But no country provides as much material as ours!! Tamilnadu elections for example!! Thats a comedian's delight...big, fat, Iyengar-in-dravidian-party Vs. six-months-away-from-death-for-six-years-oligarch....SUN TV?? they provide enough material to do an independent show daily... hmmm...how I wish things were.

2006-02-03T15:02:00.000+05:30

2006-02-01T18:00:00.000+05:30

Today I cribbed about the food here and stood in line to file my tax-returns...SHIT!!!! ive become one of them!!! For the record, bad 'pappu' is not my idea of a good meal and I dint have breakfast!!! And taxes arent such a bad thing either. Just that the shit and muck you have to go thru before you file your return can be mind-boggling!!! And some of the questions my compatriot-freshers ask can be mind-boggling...the tax-consultant nearly lost his cool..."What is a PAN card?","Can I get my mess-bills re-imbursed?", "I have a copy of my dad's online PAN card application receipt,can I file using that Number?".

This is what happens when 21-year old's enter the tax-bracket. Truth be told, I am not too comfortable paying tax at this age. Dad proabably paid when he was 28-29. How bout a one year exemption, Mr. Chiddu??? Oh you are proabably busy thinking about a higher education cess...of which you wont use a penny for education!!!!

2006-01-31T14:20:00.000+05:30

Sign on Air-Deccan flight from Hyd to Chennai:"Seats can be used for floatation purposes".
Air-hostess to passengers sitting near the emergency-exit: "In case we crash-land, you guys have to open the emergency exit. Make sure that there is no smoke or fire outside before you do this. Thank you." She said this with the same inflection that she would use for saying,"Two beers and a sandwich. Thank you." They HAVE to figure out a different way of saying that.

2006-01-25T13:41:00.000+05:30

Changed my routine for the last couple of days...its already paying dividends. Feel much much better...physically and otherwise. Log-in around 11 and leave at 7. Go home, call people,watch TV, cook...basically live like a normal human being. Going-home-at-11-and-sleeping-like-a-dog doesnt work for me. Was telling freddie about this and one thing lead to another and I started talking about my "perfect job"...well here goes:-

1.) IT/Telecom Infrastructure
2.) Domestic client
3.) 9 To 6
4.) Prefer Chennai
5.) Lunch outside office
6.) No work in the week-ends
7.) No ID-Card

Thats all I can think of right now. Everybody agrees that I am asking for too much. I'll never work for a "domestic client"...will never work 9 to 6 and will always have work in the week-ends.
I still believe that its in the realm of possibility. All this dint pop out of ether...I am looking at my "western colleagues" and frankly I am jealous. I am jealous of ppl who do the same thing I do, but who do it in a much more balanced way.Agreed there will always be the time-zone issues but I am determined to get a life!!!

Of course the small matter of a team-lead-who-left-onsite is also playing a role in my new life, but all the same!!

2006-01-23T14:50:00.000+05:30

Sathish must work on a book titled,"How to ruin your friend's Friday". He sent me an innocuous mail in the fag end of Friday that totally ruined my week-end. It was just another manic work-day for me in which I was so deep into work that I dint even have time for chain mails. Chain mails are the new torch-bearers of the lazy and the work-less. Nothing says,"I am jobless", like a mail from an Infoscian which reads," Macha finally bought tooth paste da...otha I dint know what I was going to do without it...I tried all over Mysore couldnt get my brand da...but finally........." or something like," Mama the girl sitting in my next cubicle is sooooooo hot da...ayyyyyyoooooo if only I was a little more courageous....ok leave it how are your classes going??". What makes someone to write such wonderful prose,I do not know and I dont wish to find out.

It was in the midst of this ocean of 'work' and 'toil' that I got this mail from Sathish. It contained among other things, a web-link. It turned out to be a "marriage site". Yes you read that right, a "marriage web-site" like this one!!! Hey listen I have no problem with the institution of marriage...personally, i think its a great thing. But why in the name of god would you want to have a web-site dedicated to your marriage?? Why do you want to send that to Sathish?? And why does he want to send it to me--the forlorn lover!!!

Yep, it was Naga's girl's "marriage web-site". Frankly, it was pretty obnoxious and not only because I had a crush on her. Even otherwise they looked......Arghh...*puts his head down on the key-board and starts crying*

I simply dont understand the logic behind this kind of a thing. What are you trying to prove? that the groom was an uber-geek who dint have a life?? Oh cmon!! Why do you want everyone to know how you guys met, how you guys chatted using a web-cam for 6 months(i was right, groom was a geek), how the "Second India Visit" went....Hey I understand how it feels to finally get a girl after 26 years(been there)...i know the feeling of "What?? Is this happening to me?? Am I really going out with her???". But this is just pushing it.

2006-01-20T13:55:00.000+05:30

A few months ago Ms.P told me an interesting fact. Her best-friend had told her NOT to talk to me!! The funny part is that I have never ever spoken/interacted/socialized with 'best-friend' before.Its amazing how strangers form a virulently negative image of you without even talking to you once. Agreed, my extended social group dint exactly treat 'best-friend' properly. Agreed life dealt a few fateful blows to her...but what the !@## did I do to you?? You dont know me,I dont know you, you dont know my values, you dont know where I come from... yet in 10 seconds you form an informed opinion about 22 years of my life. Oooofff, people!!

Some good news from F*R*I*E*N*D*S. Sathish may come back to Hyd. Thats a relief. How do I put this? He is 'like me'. He is from the same heritage as me--'OBC-Middle-class-Chennai-Suburbia'. Too may small-town boys in 'Cyber Residency'...not that I cant get along with them...just that it'll be nice to have atleast one guy who is 'like me'. Hmmm...the farther I get away from 'Chennai Suburbia' the more symbols I need to relate to it :))

Another good news is that 'Motta' Karthik is joining CTS today. Really feel happy for him...that guy had it really bad during campus placements...they are more like lottery anyway. Funny thing is that CTS was the only company which played truant in campus...may-be its destiny :))

One by one all my friends are coming back to Chennai. In 2 years hopefully the whole 'lala gang' and the extended drinking family will be there too.Amazing how things turn-out so differently from how you plan...In 2001 when we joined college there were 35 jobs available on campus(out of which many offers were not honoured),you had to go to Bangalore to find any meaningful work...the only legitimate alternative employment would be the H-1B route. My my, how the times have changed!!!

2006-01-18T20:38:00.000+05:30

Finally decided to go to Chennai anyway. Spending a week-end with the guys is always an amazing carrot to dangle. Otherwise, it is an enormous waste of everybody's time and energy. By the time I get ready to say good-bye to my folks,I am mentally and emotionally drained. Mom cries everytime I leave.Now I can see the justification if I was going to Idaho,but considering that I am about 1 hour away from them by air,I really dont understand it. Its funny 'cos we are the only 'emotional-NRI-family-scene' in Kamaraj domestic Airport. By-standers probably think I am in the Army or something.

Apart from that its the constant exposure to old memories. Fucking good memories too. And they produce one inevitable feeling-What the heck am I doing in Hyderabad?? Now thats NOT a good feeling to have. Trust Me. Throw in all the 'strategic-re-alignment' thats been happening here in Hyd and you have a tidal-wave of negative emotions.

Only reason I go there is to be with the guys, catch up with old times,crib about everything,come up with 'strategic action plans' that dont work,talk about the "women in our lives",probably watch Andy's fav Vijay movie...Basically be my old-self. For 3 days. Then I'll come back and join the rat-race.

Atleast the commute has become bearable now. Deccan cost me 3407 two-way. Eat that Indian!!!! Thats cheaper than their one way!!!! Air-travel has become so normal nowadays. Guys in Hyd used to tease me 'cos I was travelling by air frequently. Now, those very same guys are notching up frequent-flier points like anything. Subbu is off to Pune to meet his friends,from there he'll go to Bangalore to meet his parents and then fly back!!!! Avinash(bumulu) did an amazing 'around-south-india-in-3-days' last week. Seriously dont know how long these fares(or the airlines) will last. But hey, make hay while the sun shines!!

2006-01-18T14:29:00.000+05:30

Sidin Sunny Vadukut,the owner of Domain Maximus, has turned a new leaf in his book. I cant even begin to imagine how he feels. But I sympathize with the provocation...Office Space can be an amazing motivator to do something you've always wanted to do :))

Here's wishing him ALL THE BEST...

2006-01-16T20:39:00.000+05:30

Was talking to Dhileebhan during one of our regular fag sessions(he smokes, I drink tea.somethings never change,i still havent figured out how to smoke). He is part of the Storage team here--basically deals with back-up,disaster recovery,SAN,NAS etc...He has been asked to work for an especially hot project...it has something to do with Creekpath's product. Needless to say, he is thrilled. Thats a good thing for me cos he was putting some serious mokkai regarding the lack of "quality work" here. Ppl in an IT company can be divided into 2 types--guys like Dhilleban,who want to be on the cutting-edge of mother nature and guys like me, the drifters(who are basically lucky to make it this far).

Thats not surprising really. He is from REC Trichy...he is part of a peer group which judges him ruthlessly on how cutting-edge his work is. Nobody could ever accuse me of being a 'techie'. I must admit that I tried pretty hard in the first two years of engg. to develop that side of my personality. But, you reach a point where it becomes painfully obvious that you just dont have what it takes.

Anyway during those days I used to be fascinated by these young,hot start-ups.One of those companies was Ittiam. At one point, it was my 'dream company'.Back then I was fascinated by DSP,signal processing et al. But DSP is somewhat like fashion and gay people-only the quant gods could ever really understand it(thats an over-statement, only 2 guys out of a batch of 120 work anywhere close to DSP). Another hot-shop that was making some noise was Flarion--anyone will get an orgasm by just thinking about the possibilities that something like OFDM has to offer.

After engg. I culdnt have really hoped for a career with any of these guys,cos they would have thrown out my resume after seeing the "Projects Undertaken" category..."ADPCM Using PIC Micro-controller"...damn my hardened-in-IT-Team lead was able to see through that one!!!

But anyway I continue to visit arbit websites of arbit companies trying to make sense of what they are saying. And I continue to be fascinated by techies like Dhileebhan.

2006-01-16T15:24:00.000+05:30

Amazing how life swings between absolute bliss and total agony. The weekend before the last one was terrible--a snide remark by someone, a phone call,ensuing bickering...ohhh, it was terrible.Wanted to run-away to Chennai. This week-end was pretty chilled-out--pongal wishes,laughter,quality work for Asha,an interview on TV by Infy's founder,the ensuing excitement,thinking about potential/possibilities at work,Cocktail on Zee, long STD call to a pal... Amazing how everything changes in a matter of days.

Was chatting with Mr. A about his "Six-year plan". For as long as I can remember, I and 'A' have been discussing our 'exit-strategy'--one amazing plan that will deliver us to the pinnacle of success,good fortune and fame. Nothing has materialized so far, but I enjoy these conversations a lot.So much that I annoy other ppl who dont have the same temperament as 'A'. It takes a certain kinda guy to persist with someone like me. I read something to the effect,"Optimism doesnt necessarily guarantee success,but it drives enough people mad to make it worthwhile." Very very true.'A' is one of the few who dint go mad .Lucky me.

2006-01-13T12:32:00.000+05:30

AXN is heavily promoting "The Man's world". Being a single,Indian man living in India, I am proabably in the forefront of the target audience. I am curious and sceptical. Curious 'cos it REALLY is an interesting concept. Sceptical 'cos the promos look like they were made for 'brown-sahibs'. Hey,I dont want to know "How to pick-up a girl in a dance bar". Mostly because I dont visit dance bars. In the few bars I have visited, the only women were the waitresses. So in a TOI-ish way,this is one more " Indian reality show" that is not real.

Times Now is the latest Indian News channel.It is promoted by the same group that owns TOI. If they use the same part of their body that comes up with TOI articles, Times now's headlines would look extremely funny. "Shahid and Kareena split-up today. Bad sex was reportedly the reason for the split. We have an exclusive with Kareena's gynaec. Oh and Btw, Advani quit today. "

2006-01-11T18:22:00.000+05:30

My Yahoo inbox is the very definition of the word chaos. I have a bewildering 1798 mails in my box. 90% of them are mails from yahoo groups. The groups represent the amazing journey ive taken in the last 3 years and the range(??) of my interests..."Speech-coding" when I was trying(and failing) to develop an interest in DSP,DSP_INDIA...same genre,'Xilinx fans'...dint work out,'NidhiRazdan'...hey I am a fan ok, "Friends of Nidhi"...ok I guess I am REALLY big fan and they are the ones who post better pics, the usual school and college groups,the usual rival-groups from school and college which we had to join bcos of emotional blackmail and the fact that one of the rival-mods tried and failed to woo the original mod. Other than that Ive joined some MBA applicant groups for some schools...man they are the worst offenders in terms of mail frequency...

ive given up on my yahoo account...now use only rediffmail for personal mail...

oh btw,am using 21% of my 1GB...anybody who can beat that????

2006-01-08T16:40:00.000+05:30

Around the end of December I received a mail from a friend titled,"Sad News". I opened it to find the most shocking piece of scanned graphics I have ever seen in my life. No no it wasnt porn...it was Ms.MA's marriage invitation. Yes, as some of my friends reading this already know,Ms. MA got married recently. The reason I was shocked was that I never expected M to go like this...without a mark on the planet,without her guns blazing...in an arranged marriage!?!!?? To a "software professional" from Australia(seriously seriously how boring is that!!!).

She was always different from the rest of the girls in the class. I always thought she would go the farthest among the girls. You know something like modelling(she had the bod,btw) or choreography or something like that. Always knew that she never fit into engg.(just like me and about 100 others :) She was also gutsy.Mr. MRR,in his inimitable way, was trying to get the better of her...she just gave it right back in his face...very unlike how some of the other girls or even some staff reacted...I remember thinking,"What balls!!!".

She also made her share of mistakes. She went out with all the wrong guys...she was always know as 'someone's girl-friend'....which was not correct 'cos she was such a fierce individual in her own right. Of course,our own friendship dint bloom beyond the occasional "Hi" and "Bye".Some of my friends still dont know that I changed my place in 4th sem to sit near her :))

So why am I cribbing about some arbit stranger on a Monday morning?? I dont know,I strangely feel let-down by a stranger who I barely spoke to!!! Amidst all my life's problems and complications and complexities, I still find time to feel sorry for a nobody.

On a related note,here's a quote from 'Good Will Hunting' that echoes my thoughts on friendship.

Chuckie:Look, you're my best friend, so don't take this the wrong way. In twenty years, if you're still livin' here, comin' over to my house to watch the Patriots games, still workin' construction, I'll fuckin' kill you. That's not a threat. Now, that's a fact. I'll fuckin' kill you.

Will:Oh, come on! What? Why is it always this? I mean, I fuckin' owe it to myself to do this or that. What if I don't want to?

Chuckie: No. No, no no no. Fuck you, you don't owe it to yourself man, you owe it to me, 'cause tomorrow I'm gonna wake up and I'll be 50, and I'll still be doin' this shit. And that's all right. That's fine. I mean, you're sittin' on a winnin' lottery ticket. You're too much of a pussy to cash it in, and that's bullshit. 'Cause I'd do fuckin' anything to have what you got. So would any of these fuckin' guys. It'd be an insult to watch if you're still here in 20 years. Hangin' around here is a fuckin' waste of your time.

TOUCHE!!!!

2006-01-06T16:57:00.000+05:30

We have a "team get-together" this Sunday. There was a time,about 2 months ago, when I was really excited about these do's. I mean cmon...its free booze and free food...how many of us would say no?? And the chance to socialize with the 'high and mighty' of the team. But now its turning into a pain. After spending 5 days with these guys, I am supposed to smooch with them on the only day I have for myself?? And also the very concept of "team" is debatable...my "team" sits in Aldershot...my client is in Copenhagen. I hardly interact with 3 guys here...but hey who am I to argue. Only saving grace is booze and food in a 5-star place I normally would'nt venture into with my fresher-salary.

Nicely settled into the new account. Not much paper work,but I end up being on some kinda con-call most of the days...its fun...like the other day I was talking about Pondycherry to a French-guy in Switzerland and how different french ppl there were as opposed to Quebec. Oh yeah we also spoke about 6-sigma and delivery assurance,but only for 2 mins :)) ....

2006-01-03T12:54:00.000+05:30

This new-year was spent a lil differently. With a bunch of 20-somethings in a house and later in a restaurant. Amazingly commited individuals. Interesting mix too.There are ppl like me--22 ,24 year-old-IT types. There are the late 20-early 30-NRI types. It was the first meeting for me. Hope to make it a regular thing. There was one project I was interested in. The girl who was in-charge of it said she'll mail me about it. I guess she's a lil sceptical of recent-converts. Well, I guess just like in the office, I need to prove myself here.I've made a commitment...its going to be interesting to juggle work,classes and this...but trust me,its worth it...

2005-12-30T16:54:00.000+05:30

Will be completing one year of blogging tomorrow. Its been one heck of a year for me...the concept of 'violent change' has been driven into my head now. '05 must rank as one of the most educative year's for me...learnt a lot of things in life...mostly about people...'06 is going to be fun...me in a strange city...with a laundry list of things to do...lots of hard work ahead.

the blog turned from being a fun-pad where I made a lotta friends(and pulled quite a few ppl's leg) into a sort of a internal polambal...all the same ive had max fun here...cya in 2006...happy new year.

The Devils Alternative...

2005-12-29T13:49:00.000+05:30

...wonderful Forsyth book am facing a similair situation at work,4 of the 6 freshers drafted into my team want to quit the team.They dont think they are into this thing. I dont blame them,unless you know what you are doing this role can bring you down royally. I think i know what am doing...but u can never be 100% sure.when I hear all my friends talk about J2EE,mainframes and semi-con testing, it does feel a lil odd to be doing something radically different...the 'what-if-i-fail' factor is LOOMING over my head...not that this job doesnt have any benefits,it does--i can take my PMP in 3 years am hoping that the PMP would impress an interview board somewhere...this is also proabably the only job in the Indian IT industry that is suitable for my aptitude...

sometimes i feel am taking too many risks in life...sometimes the goals arent too clear...sometimes i just want to give up and run and be a graduate student in some god-forsaken Idaho univ studying VLSI which I dont understand(i did try to understand it).... sometimes the harder options are the easier ones to make...like a java job in chennai...

I guess it was never meant to be simple...you just have to enjoy the ride i guess...am gonna take 'D's gyaan seriously--this un-certainty,this ambiguity is what keeps a man going...this is what wakes up a man at 3 in the morning,makes him work till 12...do things he never thought he could do...like trignomentry :).....this is what keeps a man alive.....

2005-12-22T16:20:00.000+05:30

Vacation plans severely cut-back...will be spending only 3 days in Chennai..."urgent work" has come-up here...new-year party plans stand cancelled :((.....best-friend has agreed to advance his vacation by a week...thanks machan,u r an ass-hole,but i love u....cant look forward to the prospect of spending new-years eve in the office :((.....co-conspirators outside 'cyber residency' will be on-vacation...room-mate will be in GOA....LIFE SUCKS!!!!!!!!!!

2005-12-21T19:50:00.000+05:30

Carl Fox:He's using you, kid. He's got your prick in his back pocket, but you're too blind to see it.
Bud Fox: No. What I see is a jealous old machinist who can't stand the fact that his son has become more successful than he has!
Carl Fox: What you see is a guy who never measured a man's success by the size of his WALLET!
Bud Fox: That's because you never had the guts to go out into the world and stake your own claim! [Long Pause]
Carl Fox: Boy, if that's the way you feel, I must have done a really lousy job as a father.

Magic Cinema moment.From the movie Wallstreet. Insightful too...how do u measure success?? What is my definition of success?? I dont know...sometimes its a car,a dog, a woman and a job in OMR...sometimes i want to own the world...i really dont know...

Feeling low...

2005-12-19T18:34:00.000+05:30

Met Mrs.R(or atleast i thought she was Mrs. R) today. She was an old family friend from about 15 years ago. Our families were pretty close then,close enough for me to go and have a word with her. When I did go and talk to her she was kinda flagerbasted...and when she realised who I was, she got a lil irritated...I said my buh byes...got her card and left. Came to the office and called up mom...turns out that Mr.R divorced Mrs.R(in a not-so-favourable settlement i think)....and as it turns out my dad,Mr.R's best friend was also his lawyer!!!! Felt like a piece of trash after that....am still in shock...damn am lucky to come outta this alive.....cant even imagine how she must've felt!! Was muling whether to tell mom about this...would only make it worse...mom would definitely want to get intouch with her...I dont think Mrs R wants to talk to some ghost from 15 years ago!!!!

Damn i feel like trash!!!!!!!Sometimes i just wish i would just shut the hell up....you know be the INFJ that i really am....I mean all this coming-out-of-my-shell bullshit isnt clearly working...i mean i was a lot more happier when i was lil more quite and a lil more introverted....would have definitely avoided all the disappointments in hyderabad so far...but hey the gab is what got me here in the first place and it is the only thing that'll take me anywhere......hmmmm...thats something to think about!!!!

2005-12-15T19:07:00.000+05:30

Got a call from a Vinay . He is the son of the lady for whom I donated blood yesterday. They got in touch with me through the Social services commitee at work. Apart from the personal satisfaction of helping someone, you also become a worthy representative of your organisation and what it stands for. One unit of blood doesnt sound like much, but when a 70-year old man holds your hand tightly and says,"You know what, your company is good",you really feel that you are part of something bigger than you. It also puts a lil 'capitalism' in CSR(corporate social responsibility). Hey, a prospective employee may choose to join us 'cos he likes what we stand for; a municipal commisioner may overlook a certain building violation because we helped him with his education program. It may also help in preventing those Kannada-chauvinist types, who made a huge fuss about job quotas for Kannadigas.

I wanted to work with some NGO here,but ive kinda mentally commited to CAT 2006.CAT 2006 may be my one last shot at getting out of tech, i would be "too experienced" for anything else after that. So,the working-with-NGO dream has to wait.

P.S. : To all those cynics,pessimists and pricks who think this is some kinda 'resume-weight-increasing-manouvere', i have only one thing to say:!@@# you!!! Actually, I still cant figure out what it is......

2005-12-12T19:37:00.000+05:30

Went to the Salarjung Museum finally. After 4 freaking months!!! Well, priorities change when you are a recently-dumped person. Lot of learnings in Salarjung,most profound of which is that you should never visit a Museum with a bunch of Morons, who are not interested. The museum itself was a let-down from my point of view. I mean I had a decent hypothesis about the local area:Nizam invades Vijayanagaram(the AP of today).British invade India. Nizam kisses brit-butt.Nizam gets to keep un-fertile telengana, while brits merge Rayalseema and Coastal Andhra with 'Madras'.Nizam neglects Telengana. Rayalseema/coastal Andhra prospers(relatively, of course). After Independence all three regions merge. And then CHAOS!!! Telengana is not able to compete with the well-educated Coastal region. Land reforms are skewed in favour of the powerful(read educated).Telengana is oppressed and the local people are very angry. And then out of the blue, explodes a revolutionary movement in a Bengali town named Naxalbari.Telengana gults get inspired by it and the rest is history--we have the Naxal Movement of today.

I was hoping that the main museum in the centre of Telengana/Nizam-country would reflect any of the history. But No--its sheer denial!!!! Nizam was a nice guy. Salarjung was an amazing person who collected SHIT-LOADS OF PLATES!!! I swear ive never seen so many plates together!!! There were so many plates that Benny commented,"They were proabably gonna train the locals to beg all over India..." Now you know why I made that Moron comment!!! Ironically, the tiny weeny bit of history nugget I got was from Salarjungs Report card--yes, his REPORT CARD!!! It was signed by the "Controller of Examinations,Calcutta". Truly amazing--the extent of British control and the depth of the Nizams in-competence. The bugger couldnt even get himself a "controller of examination"???? And guess what Salarjung majored in?? English,Math and PERSIAN!!!! Persian??? I thought that was the Iranian language!!! Ofcourse, thats a totally different story about Hyderabad, which i shall save for later.

Rest of the week-end was a national-disaster!! Made the mistake of calling 'her'. Well I guess i became a lil nostalgic after getting drunk on Sataurday. Got accused of being a "pervert" AND an "emotional black-mailer"!!!Thats a new low in an already low-life... Well, i truly truly deserved it!!!! Aravind and Raja gave me the rod for calling!!! One silver lining was that my support system came into the picture for the first time. Avinash even insisted on coming down to Madhapur all the way from secundrabad. Frankly, i wasnt THAT upset!!! I was upset with myself for the 'temprory relapse' but thats it!!! Anyway, thanks a lot guys, dont know what I could've done without you guys!!!

You see,bachelor life is alright. You get to see things in you that you never knew you had. Some of these things are not nice, some of these things were put in a cardboard-box when you were four and were stowed away in the attic. Now you are beginning to open these boxes and you dont like what you see.And you have to learn to deal with it!!!

2005-12-05T18:34:00.000+05:30

Raja made an interesting point few days ago:The reason I am 'different' from him is that I am a "second-generation immigrant",as opposed to a recent immigrant to Chennai,like himself. 'Different' refers to pretty much everything from values to opinions on the Khushboo issue to perceptions about women .Ironically, I have to come to Hyd to perceive this difference. I guess living with someone is different from studying alongside someone. I have more in common with my North-Indian friends than my "first-generation immigrant" tamilian friends.Trust me, everyone in 'Cyber residency' is an adult and we give each other space-they know that I am not into Rajnikanth and I dont force them to tag along on my drinking binges with Freddie(where we have some uniquely "second generation immigrant" arguments).

Brilliant article in Express on the khushboo issue. But the article pits Dalits of TN with the rest. Dont know how far the assumption is valid. Dont know if Thirumavalavan is as much a 'Dalit-activist', as he is a first-generation immigrant,on the Khushboo issue. Beneath all that iconology of "tamil pride" and "chastity of the tamil women" is a simple in-security issue which is unique to the recent-immigrant.TN is on the move,and the immigrant is afraid. Afraid of change.And he is making a monkey out of himself.

I am forced to think about Immigration 'cos I am an immigrant myself,albeit an internal one. Going forward,I think internal-immigration will be the most important issue facing India in the next 50 years. Lets face it, southern cities are going to receive more and more immigrants from the north, they may not over-shadow the locals,but they'll definitely be a very important constituent. Now chennaiites can go the Bangalore/Bombay way and act like complete monkeys or we can go the Hyderabad way-the pragmatic way-and embrace them.

End of the day, I think India is gonna be one really interesting place, especially for recently-benched-amatuer-sociologists.

2005-12-02T17:06:00.000+05:30

Got some feedback on the communication training thingie:"You begin your sentences with a lot of energy,but it kinda fluctuates towards the end". Haaa....story of my life. But it was a very useful training,i think i'll follow-up on the "action-points" suggested,am supposed to open my jaws a lil more...suggested method:"eat a lotta chewing gum... :))"....arghhhh....women....The trainers are almost always from a particular demographic group:Ex-air-hostess. Training attendance was never this high before... really interesting girls:24-28,single,independent,travel a lot...oh you dont meet a lotta those in Annanagar...have to give it to North-Indians...

2005-11-30T17:13:00.000+05:30

Ive just discovered a beauty. Accounting. Drew up an excel sheet detailing my savings and expenses...I have fallen in love...You know, its not even the numbers....its the AMAZING insights you get when you detail every expense....I mean I can see EXACTLY where my money is going....and as the old saying goes,"If you can track it, you can control it"...now i beleive it... Income growth percentage reduced by half cos of my chennai trip!!!! Dad am not coming....ok am not flying anyway..... Loss because of Air-deccan's cancellation= a shade over 3 percent...Bastards....money that cant be tracked=1290...includes dinner,occasional breakfast and petrol....Is that too much?? I dont know. I know that 'Cyber residency' is not hurting me AT ALL...thats good...

2005-11-30T15:02:00.000+05:30

Wrote my first-ever PD(project definition). Sent it to my boss. Boss mailed back saying something to the effect,"Good work,but stop sounding like Al-qaida. Make it a little less belligirent...". I have this problem in written communication. I faced this during my GRE essay days. My essays tended to read like French revolution speeches...lost out atleast half a point 'cos of that(got a 5 in AWA). People are looking for stable,calm individuals...i have to con them into beleiving that I am one. Best way is to edit my mails and whatever I write before sending them. Make it look a lil more mature....maybe even get a copy of Barrons....

Nothing much happening....looking forward to Janauary...new beginnings...new project...classes...FOCUS...cos this is NOT the way to live a life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2005-11-28T18:32:00.000+05:30

Back in Hyderabad.Back to work. You wanna know what hell feels like? Try explaining what you do for a living, to your relatives. Responses have to be moderated to suit the audience;"IT company", would suffice for the 1980-educated aunts, "Not a call-centre", for more inquisitive pricks. Dont understand what ppl have against call-centres--what would you rather have us do?Register our names in the employment office and wait for 10 years?? And the ppl passing these comments arent exactly setting India on fire.

I am putting a 'morotorium' on further Chennai-visits. You cant keep shutling here and there if you want to make a connection. Unfortunately, have to go in December for ONE MORE DENTAL SITTING!!ARGHHHH!!!! Thats turning into a PITA!!! But have to do it and get it done with. Things are finally taking shape on the community thing that I wanted to do. Nothing concrete. Want to wait till Jan before I make a commitment. A firm commitment is very important in these things;ive seen my dads lions club and they stink!!! May have to make a choice between this and classes.Hmmmm.....tough choice.... But atlest my week-ends would be more productive.

2005-11-25T15:08:00.000+05:30

Mr. AA, the intrepid writer of this master-piece of a SOP, called me today. Nice chat. To all those in Chennai who want to shoot him:give him another chance (actually,some American may shoot him afterall). "There are a lotta things to do in Univ. of South California,but I am not doing it da." Oh lord: Why do I get all the wierdest friends??
Leaving office early today. Off to Chennai tomorrow. Have to pack. Have the Graha-pravaesam ceremony on Sunday. The new house has something ive never ever had in my life--a cute neighbour(and now i live in Hyderabad...life...). She's one of those "bubbly types"....have to look her up. Actually, am too old for this inter-flat romance thing. Or am I?? Am looking all over the place ...why not the local neighbourhood. I just have one question for the new-neighbour,"You are not from PSBB,are you??".....LOL!!!!

2005-11-24T20:02:00.000+05:30

During my last trip to Chennai, I was saturated with problems(real and percieved). I tore out a page from my sister's diary and started writing all the things that were worrying me:

1.) A relationship gone sour.
2.) An assignment at work, which,I thought was way over my head.
3.) A technical certification I was supposed to take.
4.) General worry about the direction of life.

I drew up an Issue tree about all the above four(yes yes ive been reading too much Mckinsey litreature,shoot me). It was pretty elaborate. I was so impressed that Instead of tearing it up and putting it in the dust-bin(where it belonged), I put it in my bag. Forgot all bout it. Till yesterday. Fished it out from my shaving-kit. Was so shocked to see the damn thing!!!! Life had changed so freaking dramatically:

1.) She was a *&^%%. And universally accepted as one. Proabably the biggest mistake of my life(ok maybe my second biggest,Aravind still rules the chart). What was such a big heart-brake then, is NOTHING now.Hardly think about her. Ive moved on. Will meet and mingle with new people. I may have to shoot one guy undergoing training in Infosys Mysore. He was the one who got me into this mess.

2.) I was only supposed to be a "temporary back-up" for this assignment. More suited work will turn-up in January. BUT,i'll milk this assignment to death in any application I ever write after this. Least they can do for 14-hour work-days.

3.) This thing is my favourite: Boss says,"What course?? Get back to work!!!". Chosen a less challenging certification.

4.) I do worry about this one. But It doesnt control my life as it used to.

Looking back at life, things that seemed so large and in-surmountable seem so dumb and easy now. 12th std. maths exam,First semester mid-sem massacare,tough people in college,tougher people at home...now I can look back and say,"What the heck was all the worrying about??".Wonder why it is so tough to feel that way in the present moment.
Have decided to start a personal diary. Atleast I'll get,"What the heck was all that bout??",more frequently. And trust me ,"What the heck was all that bout??",helps A LOT.

2005-11-24T15:35:00.000+05:30

Familiar question. "Do you want to move to Chennai?". No. "Why?"

1.) Have an amazing professional network in-place here. Its just AWESOME. Un-beleiveable. Stretching right to the top.

2.) Starting to form a personal network outside the office/Sambhar gang.

3.) My parents live in Chennai. Though I dont hate them,I cant live with them either. Its something unique--you have to see it to beleive it.

4.) Am hoping some 'un-desirables' from Madhapur would move,leaving me with peace of mind. God please help me with this one.

I know this post doesnt make any sense. Wait till March.

Corporate Lessons....

2005-11-23T18:57:00.000+05:30

....Never promise something you cant deliver.
....Once you promise, deliver. Whatever it takes.

Come to think of it, I dont know why this became apparent to me only now.

Confused.....

2005-11-22T14:35:00.001+05:30

Yesterday was another boring day in the office....till Raja called me on the Nortel,"Macha...odanae vaadaa". I thought he had discovered some new way of sending Voice Packets through IP. Was sorely dis-appointed. Awaiting me was the one constant thing that has been following me ever since I became a member of the WWW--Really Bad Group Mails. Fortunately I wasnt a member of this group. The owner tried to recruit me,but I dint budge-it had too many loosers as members and I had too much junk on my inbox. I was right about the group:

Ms. 'x' sent the following ,rather innocuous, mail:

Subject: [genius] Read as vadivelu... in GIRI movie> > Read as vadivelu... in GIRI movie>
Nan sari oru round thane nu oru interview ku poneen > Anga 5 per ma, > Maathi Maathi question kettainga. > Ennala mudincha varaikkum answer sonneen. Apram 4th> floor ponga offer vangikkunga nu sonnanuga > Sarinu nanum nambi 4th floor ku poneen. > Anga 8 per ma, > Avangalala evlo mudiyumo avlo question kettanga. > Dhidir nu oruthan HR ku phone a pottu... > machan.. free ya iruntha vada inga oruthan sikki> irukkanu sonnan. > Ange avanala evalavu mudiyumo avalavu ketaan. > Nanum evlo neram than answer therinja mathiriye> nadikkarathu. > Adula oruthan sonnan ,enna question kettalum> samalikiranda > Evan Romba Nallavanu sollitan maaa...

All hell broke loose after that-'Nazi Bitch' Wrote:

AGREED.... TAMILIANS ARE EVERYWHERE... JUST LIKEVIRUSES... DOESN'T MEAN U START SENDING TAMILMAILS!!!!

'X' responded:

Hi ppl,Please accept my apologies for sending out a regionallanguage joke.I just wanted to share a good joke. That is why ispecified 'Tamil' in the Subject heading.But #$%^& had no right in calling Tamilians 'Viruses'.She could have sent out a decent mail requesting menot to send out messages in regional languages oratleast to share the joke in a more common medium ofcommunication.I do not want to remain a member of a group thatallows HATE MAIL to be sent out.

'Nazi Bitch' responded:

I think i've told more than enough times to use "amore common medium ofcommunication"... But ppl don't seem to understandwhen it is told nicely..

This is the point when Raja made that ,"Odanae vaadaa" call. On a normal day I wouldnt have bothered too much about this. But today Raja wanted blood. Bugger took it too seriously. And when I refused aid,he took it personally. So off we went,on our mission to right a historical wrong:

Hi Guys,

This is Rajarajan..........

xxxx/nnnn: If the two of you have any extraneous/parochial issues with life,then please take it off-line. In case you forgot, all of us receive these mails. Whether Tamilians are viruses or not is a great question,unfortunately this is not the forum to address these issues.Btw,I am flattered by the,"tamilians are everywhere" comment.It made my day.

Ram: Please moderate the mails.

luv,
raja

Agreed, "extraneous/parochial" looks a 'lil out of place here. But the Intellectual achievements of the group's membership can be written on the back of a match-box, so I dint bother much.I have a feeling that 'Nazi Bitch' was lil flustered.So her friend responded:

Hi Raja,That issue as far as i understood was made public only to let all the tamilians know what poor non-tamilians have to put up with...and not to portay any extraneous/parochial issues with BBBB/XXXX lives (not that there are any that i know of..)
Regards,
SSSSS.

We sent:
Hi,

Wow!!! You are trying to make such a learned point by calling all Tamilians,"viruses"?? I dont have an issue with bbbbb's message(right or wrong,I dont know/care);I just wish that she had a better choice of words.
luv,
raja

After this, the moderator finally woke-up and called for peace.Nice timing dude.

Amazes me.'Nazi Bitch' is an Educated Indian. From a very previleged background. I can atleast try to understand the un-educated VHP activist;the 'Educated Indian Bigot' confounds me totally.

The first 4 months

2005-11-21T13:40:00.000+05:30

One of my room-mates quit 'Cyber-residency' yesterday. Had a fight with another room-mate. One issue.Mis-placed priorities. Funny thing is that the two of them were college-mates-b&*^%$. The guy who stayed back had the gall to accuse me of,"...not doing enough". WTF!!!! You dont open your mouth,you are the most non-political guy in the room,and they STILL blame you!!!!!! Its been a rapid deterioration-i still remember the heydays of August-used to have so much fun. Boozing whenever we wanted,going out,calling-up girls--used to be so much fun. Nowadays I'd be very lucky if I saw two of them together during a week-day. Hmmm.... I guess its natural progression. One of my college seniors warned me about Hyderabad. Apparently,the city has an amazing way of boring its immigrants in 3 months-straight. This week-end was especially bad 'cos some of the co-conspirators outside 'cyber res' were writing CAT and others were preping for GRE.We have planned to buy a TV. Hopefully that shld do the trick.

Chennai is so much better in that sense. You have ballet classes,libraries,Spencers,movies,beaches,pondy,amethyst....... Its a great city to be single. Nahhh...i guess am just missing home. And i wouldnt exchange the freedom that this place offers with anything else.
Tried listing the '10-things-that- I- never- did- before', which i did in the last 4 months of freedom:
1.) Flew alone.And paid for it myself.
2.) Waited outside/went inside a girls hostel.(legally.dint sneak-in)
3.)Slept at 5AM and woke up at 3 PM(Sunday)
4.) Drunk white rum( many thanks to my RECTian friends-u guys are great)
5.) Washed my clothes.
6.) Made up my bed-miss u mommy :((
7.)Tried to pay tax(still trying)
8.) Danced.(it was an office party. and i would do ANYTHING,including making a fool outta myself, to impress my boss)
9.) Called up someone at 3 in the morning(would be killed if i did this at home)
10.) Worked till 3 in the morning(never done that one)

Even if I did 2 of the above-mentioned things in chennai,I would be royally-grounded!! Another issue is that I have some seriously screwed-up timings(half my sponsors are in the US). So i'll be putting my folks thru hell if i was in chennai.Living-alone is fun. Just need to get my support-systems in-place again.

2005-11-17T19:15:00.000+05:30

Long day today.Lost in a world of Excel and Powerpoint. Lost count of the no. of times I swore at Microsoft for creating those two incredible applications. Hopefully 'D' would appreciate all this.'D' reminds me of Terry Benedict(Andy Garcia) in Oceans Eleven--cool,calm,under-control and utterly ruthless.

Terry: All right. Now I have complied with your every request, would you agree?
Rusty: I would.
Terry: Good, 'cause now I have one of my own. Run and hide, asshole. Run and hide. If you should be picked up next week buying a hundred-thousand dollar sports car in Newport Beach, I am going to be supremely disappointed. Because I want my people to find you, and when they do, rest assured we are not going to hand you over to the police. So my advice to you again is this: run and hide. That is all that I ask.

Of course,ive never seen 'D' before;only heard his voice on the phone. You see how utterly jobless I am. Anyway talking bout Oceans Eleven, lemme give you the one piece of dialogue that keeps ringing in my mind 300 times a day:

Rusty: Why do this?
Danny: Why not do it? [Rusty shakes his head]
Danny: Cause yesterday I walked out of the joint after losing four years of my life and you're cold-decking "Teen Beat" cover boys. [pause]
Danny: Cause the house always wins. Play long enough, you never change the stakes. The house takes you. Unless, when that perfect hand comes along, you bet big, then you take the house. [another pause]
Rusty: Been practicing this speech, haven't you?
Danny: Little bit. Did I rush it? Felt I rushed it.
Rusty: No, it was good, I liked it. The "Teen Beat" thing was harsh.

Yeah, thats all i think all day and night--"...when that perfect hand comes along, you bet big, then you take the house". But there is that tendency in every man-the need to "take the house".To throw it all away and go for 3 casinos. Me am waiting for my "perfect hand".

2005-11-14T14:55:00.000+05:30

Went to the ISB info-session yesterday. If they give admission based on the number of times a candidate attends their info-sessions, then i'd get thru without a glitch. This is my 3rd visit to an ISB event in the last one year(twice in Hyd and once in Chennai). This event was lil different 'cos it was hosted/conducted entirely by current students and Alumini. I know atleast 5 blog-watchers who are interested in ISB. Here's my perspective:

1.) First thing that struck my mind yesterday(unlike the last 2 times) was,"What the heck can I offer this place??". Answer: NOTHING. You see, unlike other Indian B-schools, ISB has a VERY experienced/diverse peer group(Avg.ex.=5yrs). So,unlike other Indian B-schools, I(the humble Indian "IT professional" with 2 yrs work-ex) would be the lowest life-form in the school.I dont think ppl would be standing in line to have me in their study group.

2.) OK, what about placements?? Lets just say that dreaming about anything other then IT/ITeS is pushing the limits of optimism.

Dont get me wrong, ISB is a great school. More importantly,it has a vision. If you are from one of the IIT's, have about 2-4 yrs of work-ex and would like to move into I-banking/consulting,then this is proabably the perfect school for you(heck u get Wharton/Stern professors here at Indian prices). Or if you are a NRI-desi-engg.,looking to come back to the Indian market, then this is perfect for u.

Not saying that ppl with IT background dont do well here.Have read a zillion blogs of ppl who've excelled.Frankly,I am not ready for this place AT THIS POINT OF TIME.Ive spent 17 years of life studying in places where i dint belong;not gonna make that mistake again.Next 2 yrs of my life have to be spent to get to a level, where I am confident of my own abilities. Or atleast am gonna have bloody fun trying!!!

New start....

2005-11-11T15:45:00.000+05:30

Hey what the heck....in a new city,new job....finding new ways of humiliating myself.....why not a new blog name/template....i like this one....kinda bright and all....

2005-11-09T20:41:00.000+05:30

ISB is conducting an info-session on Nov 13. You can register here. Me not serious about apping in the near future; just going there to have a look. Its also a "team-building","motivational" excercise for the CAT-takers of cyber-residency(thats the name of the place i live in.i love the hyderabadi sense of humour).